Eragon: Chapter Twenty-Seven: Of Reading and Plots

[pangolin20]

Chapter Twenty-Six (Part III) | Table of Contents | Chapter Twenty-Eight (Part I)

Kerlois: A good day, everyone, and welcome back to Eragon! Last time, Solembum gave Eragon some vague advice, Eragon discussed that with Saphira, and Brom decided to teach Eragon how to read.

For the reader post:

On chapter 23, both Alec and Maegwin note that Eragon would not have any “excess fat” to lose during his training period, since he had to hunt for food for his family, and that does not make it easy to gain fat. I think this is appropriate:

Did Not Do the Research: 116

On chapter 24, Maegwin points out that the bartender in the Green Chestnut letting his guests use broken glasses is quite irresponsible, and as Corneille Noire points out, would likely not go over well with the guests, either. The tavern may be a stereotype, but there ought to be some reality in how it works, I find.

Ill Logic: 56

On part III of chapter 25, Alec notes that it would be quite unlikely for Eragon and co. to have “stuffed suckling pig” for dinner, as it would be rather expensive.

Did Not Do the Research: 117

They further note that Jeod should probably have a chimney in his house to deal with the improbable smoke in his house. Even if this house was originally built without one, I would think that Jeod would have had one put in; I doubt he wants to sit in the smoke all day, after all.

Ill Logic: 57

Wolfgoddess notes that it makes no sense for there to be a “loud crash” when Saphira flies off the cliff; she would have had to crash into something, which she shows no sign of and which would be uncharacteristically clumsy for her.

PPP: 804

On part IV of that chapter, Alec notes that Eragon being amazed at the concept of someone long dead being able to talk to living people falls quite flat when he has experienced the same thing via the oral tales told in Carvahall.

PPP: 805

Wolfgoddess notes that Jeod could have hidden Domia Abr Wyrda in another book as a basic safety measure if he really would be persecuted.

On part I of chapter 26, Alec points out that Eragon carrying a bow in public would probably get him in trouble with guards (as I would imagine, on further thought). They also note that Eragon going out to hunt would be a good alibi for his visits to Saphira.

Ill Logic: 58

Wolfgoddess notes that Eragon becoming more elflike within several months is rather quick. I suppose Paolini wanted to have these changes be visible within the scope of the series, and I am fine with that… but, as with the very rapid growth of the dragons, there needs to be some kind of explanation for it.

Cardboard Worldbuilding: 15

In response to my question of how Solembum knows Eragon is a Riders, she notes that he probably smelled Saphira on his clothing. That does wholly explain it (and I do feel a bit silly for not coming up with it).

On part II of chapter 26, Alec notes that “Manin” and “Hugin” (or “Hügin”, to go by the new edition), are clearly derived from Odin’s ravens, Huginn and Muninn. I had known that, but did not consider it very relevant to bring up… and here it is anyway, then.

With that done, let us resume with the next chapter! (leaves)

Fumurti: Here I am again, then. It’s been quite a while, and I’m eager to begin again!

HISC: Today, we will be taking on a rather short chapter (the fourth-shortest of the whole series, in fact), which has also been revised the heaviest of all. Unfortunately, the revision seems to have consisted more of cutting (and the chapter has been reduced to a fifth of its previous size!) and less of actually making it better, so… we will see how that turns out.

Chapter Twenty-Seven: Of Reading and Plots

Fumurti: This is an appropriate title for the self-published edition, but less so here; we will be seeing the reading, but the “plots” part will be off-screen now.

PPP: 806

HISC: The self-published edition opens with Eragon waking up (on what is the 28^th of January), eating breakfast, and then going to see Brom in the study, where he is sitting on the hearth.

Fumurti: The revision removes all of this, which I can kind of see (if anything should have been removed, it would be the going to sleep/waking up scenes)… but we do need to see where this takes place. Instead, we open on Brom showing Eragon his first letter, and then the scene already ends. It would work better in a visual medium; there we could show that it is morning and that this is in the study without needing to draw attention to it, and then segue into a Eragon’s training. Since this is not a visual medium, it is… rather scarce.

PPP: 807

So we actually open on Brom “scratch[ing] a rune on parchment with charcoal”, and then showing it to Eragon. He says it is “the letter a”, and tells Eragon to learn it. Let me first note that, the HISC to the contrary, this is thankfully not how Brom ends up teaching Eragon how to read, as he’ll soon be teaching Eragon the correspondences between letters and sounds. That does make me wonder why Brom is teaching the letters separately from that; it would make some sense if he wanted to teach Eragon to recognise keywords, but here it seems quite inefficient to me, and Brom should want to avoid that, since he wants to be gone from Teirm as quickly as possible. (It’s probably because he doesn’t know the first thing about teaching, but given how he teaches swordfighting and magic, I’d have expected him to rush through the training, instead of this.)

Ill Logic: 59

I also like that the alphabet in use conveniently starts with the letter “a”, and calls that letter “a”, too, just as is quite often the case in the Latin alphabet; doing something else might have made this more interesting, I think. I can’t exactly say it’s bad worldbuilding, though, so I won’t complain about it. I also feel like complaining about Brom using parchment for Eragon’s writing lessons, since a slate would do just as fine and would be easier to reuse… but charcoal is easy to remove, I see, so the parchment could probably be reused after each lesson. So, I will let this pass.

Well, with this first letter, Eragon “be[gins] the task of becoming literate”. And so we also begin to solve this sidequest, so we can finally go back to finding the Ra’zac (which took more than long enough)! Eragon finds learning to read difficult and it “pushe[s] his intellect to its limits”, but he does enjoy it. Since he has nothing else to do, and he has “a good—if sometimes impatient—teacher”, he “advance[s] rapidly”. You’ve got to show us Brom being good for us to believe it, Paolini, and him being impatient with Eragon only points in the other direction. And if he’s so impatient, which I’m not quite sympathetic to when Eragon’s already learning faster than anyone could, why doesn’t he go with Kerlois’s suggestion and only teach him some keywords? That would save them quite some time and be just as useful, after all.

Ill Logic: 60

Also, while Eragon may “advance quickly”, he still needs time to become fluent in these skills, and I’m not quite getting the idea that Paolini understands that.

Well, we are told that a “routine” quickly emerges. Eragon gets up in the morning, eats in the kitchen, then goes to the study for his lessons, “where he labor[s] to memorize the sounds of the letters and the rules of writing”. “It [gets] so” that he sees “letters and words” when he closes his eyes, and he thinks of little else during his lessons. Let me show my thoughts again…

- I see that Brom’s trying to speed up the training by spending a large part of the day on it. I think that would work to some extent, but after a while, Eragon just won’t be able to absorb much of anything any more, not to mention that he does need breaks to be able to refocus. In fact… we do have a mention of breakfast, and will soon get one of dinner, but there’s no mention of lunch, so does he actually have it? I’ll be charitable and assume that he did have it (if only because it doesn’t strictly interfere with dinner), but if you tell us just where Eragon has breakfast, I don’t think it’s too much to ask to want to know if he has lunch.

PPP: 807

Back to the main point, keeping Eragon at his lesson continuously and for most of the day won’t work nearly as well as Brom and Paolini think, so…

Did Not Do the Research: 118 (for the rather questionable teaching)

- Brom does teach him the sounds of the letters, which is actually a good way to teach Eragon how to read, so credit for that!

- I note that Eragon learns “the rules of writing”, and later in this book, he’s able to write, so Brom has presumably taught him that, too. It would be quite nice to be told that, instead of having to infer it.

PPP: 808

It also opens some further holes in the story. Why would Brom bother teaching him how to write, after all? It’s not necessary for reading the records, and it will only make his reading harder, since he’ll need to split his attention between the two tasks.

Ill Logic: 61

Yeah, it’s convenient to have Eragon already able to write later on, but it should still make sense. What doesn’t make sense is for Eragon to learn to write in a week; the estimate of several months Kerlois gave for reading also goes for writing, since that applied to literacy as a whole.

Did Not Do the Research: 119

- I also note that it doesn’t sound appealing. Yes, Eragon apparently enjoys it, but we only hear about how difficult it is, and how long a while Brom has him working on it, which doesn’t exactly sound joyful to me. The complete lack of detail on how he learns doesn’t help, either; with swordfighting or learning magic, I find the details make the lessons engaging, and it does sound like something I’d want to learn, too (in principle, at least). For reading, I guess Paolini wasn’t interested in it, because it’s a quite basic skill to have? All the same, it could be quite interesting, and I’m a bit disappointed at not getting to see any of it.

Back with the schedule… after his lessons and before dinner, they go to spar behind Jeod’s house. Good on them for bothering to keep that up! During these, the servants, “along with a small crowd of wide-eyed children”, come to watch.

HISC: “Servants” made sense in the original, when there were both the butler and the cook; now there is only one, so Paolini might have wanted to reread the revised version to make sure it still made sense.

PPP: 809

Fumurti: So there is a “crowd of children” watching Brom and Eragon swordfighting, where Eragon uses a red sword. I don’t doubt that these children will spread it around further (especially when there’s already a crowd), which could draw unwelcome attention, especially when Zar’roc is recognised as a Rider’s sword. So much for not drawing attention, I suppose… I do wonder why they don’t try to send the children away, or ask Jeod for a more secluded spot to spar in, as I wonder how there’s a “small crowd” of children (and shouldn’t there be just one or two at first?) when there were no children playing in the streets earlier. It might be because this is a better section of Teirm, but still.

Ill Logic: 62

PPP: 810

If there’s any time before dinner once they’re done, Eragon practices magic in his room, “with the curtains securely closed”. That is a sensible measure to take, which makes me suspect that Paolini just didn’t think people watching the swordfighting was in any way dangerous. That aside… I think that magic is not something that Eragon should only be training in when there’s time for it. Yes, keeping up sparring is important, too, but they can do shorter rounds and be able to practice magic too, and magic is much more versatile than swordfighting, so it really shouldn’t be neglected.

Ill Logic: 63 (I see this schedule’s really not making much sense)

Now it’s time for Saphira, since Eragon worries about her. He still visits her every evening, but that isn’t long enough for either of them (I think myself that it’s perfectly fine for both of them, given how toxic their relationship is). In the day, Saphira spends most of her time “leagues away hunting for food”, since hunting closer to Teirm would attract suspicion (but picking Eragon up in sight of everyone totally won’t). Eragon “[does] what he [can] to help her”, but he knows the only solution to her “hunger and loneliness” is to leave Teirm.

Hmm, I can see what Paolini is going for: Saphira needs to avoid unwelcome attention, and so hunting is quite difficult, and she needs to spend a long time on it. When I think about it, though, it doesn’t make much sense. To begin with, Paolini seems to think that “leagues” away is quite far for Saphira; it would be if she could only walk, but since she can fly, it is not so much. For example, let me say that she can fly at 20 miles an hour (32,18 kilometres an hour), and she flies three leagues, which is nine miles. Then a trip back and forth would take 18 miles/20 miles an hour = 0,9 hours or 54 minutes. So, if she is spending most of the daytime out hunting, I presume that she spends several hours looking for prey, which just makes me wonder what’s taking her so long. The obvious answer to that is that she has to avoid being seen, but she’s got several months of practice with that, so finding a good hunting spot like that really shouldn’t be taking her this long. Then it might be that there isn’t enough prey for her, which shouldn’t be an issue, since she can take livestock if she really needs to. The only way I can see her take so long and still be hungry is if she’s being much more cautious than the situation calls for.

PPP: 810 (for Paolini not exactly understanding what he wrote)

Something like this could work if Saphira had to stay close to Teirm as often as possible, in case something goes wrong and she’s needed; then she might well have trouble to find time hunting and be hungry. I also have to wonder just how Eragon’s trying to help her. Is he hunting for her? I appreciate the gesture in that case, but I don’t think it’ll help Saphira all that much.

All that aside… it does suck for them that they can’t be together (never mind that they didn’t need to be separated here in the first place…), and I can sympathise with trying to help but it not being enough. I’d have liked it if it had made sense.

Now for the “grim news” coming into Teirm every day! Arriving merchants tell about “horrific attacks along the coast”, and there are reports of “powerful people disappearing from their houses in the night and their mangled corpses being discovered in the morning”. Eragon often hears Brom and Jeod softly talk about this, but never when he’s close. I… think they think it’s got something to do with the Varden, then, since they’re still determined to keep Eragon in the dark about them. Apart from that, the attacks do sound suitably impressive, especially “powerful people” being abducted from their homes, but as for why this is happening and who’s doing it, I’ve got no idea, so let me look closer.

I’m interested in the “horrific attacks” along the coast. Given the connection led to the Varden, I should consider it in that light, but I don’t think attacking coastal villages would do much to hurt the Varden. For what it could be, my first thought was raids, possibly by pirates and/or Urgals. The former were said not to be so active, but I can consider the latter; since many Urgals have left, there may not be enough villages left for the remaining ones to raid (which is a cultural thing), so they expanded to the coastal villages. It makes as much sense as anything, I’d say.

For the “powerful people” disappearing… that does sound like it’s connected to the Varden, since it reminds me of the way the Empire’s sinking the ships of the Varden’s merchants. In this case, I think these “powerful people” are connected to the Varden, so the Empire’s agents are killing them and then leaving their bodies as warning that they’ll be coming for the other Varden.

I do have some problems with this. The first is why Teirm doesn’t have any assassinations, though that could just be because it’s one of the larger cities on the coast, and because it’s been assigned soldiers. Beyond that, I have much the same trouble as with the attacks on the ships. With the assassinations, for example, it would work just as well to tell the governors of the cities or the local lords/ladies that these people are working for the Varden. They might not be believed, but it’ll still give these people less trouble than being caught after an assassination. At least these don’t have as far-reaching consequences as attacking the trade does…

Ill Logic: 65

My main complaint, though, is once again “why does no one do something about this?”. Sure, with the coastal attacks, there’s probably little that can be done, but I’d still expect requests for help from Teirm to come in along with the reports of the attacks themselves. As for the assassinations… I can see them occur unopposed at first, so maybe I shouldn’t be complaining about it, but if reports of them are reaching Teirm, I’d think that the targeted communities could have prepared themselves for it. They could set up a guard for likely targets, for example, or fool the assassins into thinking that the “powerful person” is there, and then ambush them. It might be dangerous, since the assassins are probably magicians, but it could certainly be done, and I think it’d be worth it. So… of course no one seems to be doing anything about any of this.

Ill Logic: 67 (+2)

I’m having less trouble with this than with the attacks on the ships, since this isn’t as widespread a problem, but they still should be trying to do something about it! Of course, these people do seem to do just that after Eragon leaves, because we’ll never be hearing about the attacks or the assassinations again (or Paolini just forgot about them).

I think this is caused by Paolini wanting to show us that the situation is dire because no one can oppose the attacks. In that case, though, we need to see that the attacks are overwhelming the efforts made to counter them, not that everyone refuses to do anything about them; that gives us an Idiot Plot rather than being tense, after all.

Time for something different! The days pass quickly for Eragon, and soon he’s been learning for a week (which puts us at the 4^th of February). His skills are “rudimentary”, but he can read entire pages without Brom’s help. He reads slow, but knows that speed will come with training. Um, if being able to read entire pages counts as rudimentary, what’s supposed to be a good level of literacy? Being able to read pages simply by glancing at them? If you can read whole pages without trouble, even if it is slow, you’ll have most of the benefits of being able to read; improvement is more a question of training rather than of learning new things by then. I do like that Eragon’s not quite perfect at reading; it shows Paolini’s got some restraint with respect to Eragon’s learning.

PPP: 811

Brom doesn’t mind that he’s slow with reading and says he’ll “do fine for what [he has] planned”. My, whatever could that possibly be?

HISC: Given that we will soon be reaching the heavily revised portion of this, and since I know not everyone has read the overview, let me summarise what was there. In the self-published edition, Brom explains the plan, Eragon and Jeod voice their objections, and Brom ropes them into it anyway (because it will be totally fine). After that, Eragon wishes that he does not have to leave, then falls asleep and has a vision in his dreams. The next day, they enter the castle for reconnaissance, then prepare themselves to leave. Eragon goes to visit Saphira, they talk about this plan, then Saphira brings up trying to scry the inside of the room. Eragon asks about this with Brom, who explains about scrying, and then they have their discussion about Galbatorix sending the Ra’zac after Brom, and Eragon living or dying for his cause. The revised version is quite different, so let us get to it!

Fumurti: So in the afternoon, Brom calls Jeod and Eragon to the study. Wouldn’t Eragon be there anyway for his lessons, or has Brom stopped teaching him yesterday?

HISC: The self-published edition has it happen that evening after dinner, which makes more sense with this. I can see why Paolini shifted it to the afternoon, since the plan will now be taking place this night, and there needs to be some time for preparations, but he should have adjusted this a little better. I think that Eragon is supposed not to have lessons today, since the week Brom claimed for that has already passed, but it could be a bit clearer.

PPP: 812

Fumurti: I also note that he’s said to “summon” them to the study, because simply calling them wouldn’t fulfil his rudeness quota or something. Once they’re there, he gestures at Eragon and says that he thinks it’s “time to move ahead” now that Eragon can help, which prompts Eragon to ask what he has in mind. …It’s a very fair question to ask, but I get the impression that Eragon really doesn’t know, and he should have been able to figure that out long before now.

Ill Logic: 65

Brom smiles fiercely at the question, at which Jeod complains because that look “got [them] into trouble in the first place”. Brom thinks that’s a “slight exaggeration”, but admits it’s “not unwarranted”. I’d think so, given how reckless he’s been. Then he goes to explain the plan… and the scene cuts off there.

HISC: And here Paolini indeed removes the entire discussion of the plan, presumably because it would be not very tense if he showed us it to us and then had it go completely right. I can somewhat get behind that, though 1) I do not want this to be tense at all, since it is a quite irrelevant sidequest, and I absolutely do not want to see it compounded by another complication, and 2) we already know what the plan is, so keeping it from us has little effect besides making it seem like Paolini has a rather dim view of the audience’s intelligence. (Beyond that, I did like the discussion and Jeod’s reaction, so it is a pity to see it gone.)

Fumurti: Yeah, that’s about what I thought; hiding the plan really doesn’t serve any purpose now. I also note that, as in the original, Jeod doesn’t bother to inform Helen of the plan. I kind of get it, since I highly doubt that she’d let him go if she knew of this, but even then, shouldn’t he at least put some contingencies in place in case the plan does go wrong and he ends up jailed? If you have to go behind her back (and you really don’t), then at least try not to let her suffer for your mistakes.

Morals for Thee But Not for Me: 76

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We pick up again with Eragon telling Saphira that they will leave “tonight or tomorrow”, presumably having just told her the plan, which he does “from within his room”.

HISC: In the self-published edition, he went to visit Saphira, after all, which does not work well with the new timeline. Most of their conversation has been removed, but this remains, as does Saphira bringing up scrying, which has been moved to chapter 25.

Fumurti: At hearing about the plan, Saphira says it’s “unexpected” and asks if he’ll be safe during “this venture”. I presume that Eragon told her about Brom’s comment about giving Brand a “nasty surprise” and how long he’d teach Eragon, so I think she should have figured out what would be happening too, especially since she hasn’t been taught constantly.

Ill Logic: 66 (trying to keep the plan a surprise makes everyone look quite dense)

In response to Saphira’s question, Eragon says that he doesn’t know, and they might well “end up fleeing Teirm with soldiers on [their] heels”. Saphira gets worried, so he tries to reassure her by saying it will be all right, since he and Brom “can use magic, and [they’re] good fighters”.

…Who is this and what has he done with Eragon? He’s never been this calm about situations like this, and he won’t exactly be it going forward, either! And sure, he and Brom can use magic, but I wouldn’t class Brom as a good fighter, given his performances with the Ra’zac and Yazuac, and Eragon hasn’t done much fighting, so how would he know he’s good at it? Further, “we know how to fight” isn’t exactly reassuring when getting into a fight (or being somehow chased out of Teirm, for that matter) shouldn’t be much of a problem if they were marginally competent. He might be doing it because he doesn’t like Saphira worrying over him, but it rather looks like he doesn’t understand the gravity of the situation at all. I find this all quite weird.

PPP: 813

HISC: The self-published edition does not give much clarification; Eragon says much the same thing, Saphira asks if he is really sure of this, to which Eragon says he is not sure, but if they have to leave Teirm, they might as well get the information they came there to find (because finding the Ra’zac would clearly be a “might as well” to him). I do find it a pity that we lost a moment of Saphira actually being wise like she is supposed to be.

Fumurti: Saphira indeed doesn’t get any reply, as we cut from Eragon saying they’re good fighters to him lying in bed and staring at the ceiling.

PPP: 814

He doesn’t seem to feel very well, as his hands are shaking and he has a “lump in his throat”. Let me see… yes, that is attributable to the self-published edition; while this takes place at the same point in the chapter, it originally took place after Eragon’s conversation with Brom about possibly having to die for his cause. There, it makes sense that he’d feel so bad; here, I could connect it with him being worried about the plan going wrong, if he’d expressed worry about that. Since he doesn’t, this is completely random.

PPP: 815

As he begins to fall asleep, he feels a “wave of confusion” and thinks that he doesn’t want to leave Teirm. The time he has spent there has been “almost normal”, and he would love not to “keep uprooting [him]self”. It’d be wonderful to stay in Teirm and “be like everyone else”. Then he realises that he’ll “never be able to” while Saphira is around.

I do like this! It really makes sense that Eragon would want to stay in Teirm, I find; he has lost his home, after all, and he hasn’t had the chance to make much connections during his travel. Being able to settle down again and find a community for himself would certainly be nice for him (and it would help him get away from Brom and Saphira, of course). If he did, though, that would mean that he couldn’t continue on his quest, like Paolini wants him to, and I think that that is why he gave Eragon the second thought, so he could realise that trying to settle down won’t happen. Despite that he does end up settling down with Saphira for a longer period of time (the first time outside of the Empire, the second time after Galbatorix is dead; Galbatorix is the main reason he would be unable to settle down, after all), so I’m far from convinced that it “won’t happen”. It does make sense for Eragon to have such a thought, I suppose, but I still don’t like that there’s no serious consideration of abandoning the quest. To summarise, I’d like it if Paolini would let Eragon make his own decisions, instead of making him further the plot.

(I also have to wonder about Eragon describing his time in Teirm, which has involved two days of going around the city, and a week of high-intensity study, as “almost normal”. Also, my first reaction to “I’ll never be able to be like everyone else while Saphira is around” was “then get rid of her”; that would do everyone a favour, I’d think.)

So we cut to Eragon dreaming. The dreams apparently “own[] his consciousness”, and “twist[] and direct[] it to their whims”. Maybe it’s time to take up lucid dreaming, then?

HISC: I note that this was taken from the opening of “Deathwatch”; I suppose Paolini was fond enough of the line that he wanted to keep it no matter where it ended up.

Fumurti: It’s a decent enough image, I suppose. So, at times Eragon “quake[s] with fear”, and at others he “laugh[s] with pleasure” (which doesn’t wake him up for some reason?), but then he has a dream clearer than he has ever had… or rather a vision, because this one is in italics, as was the previous one. In it, he sees a “young woman, bent over by sorrow” in a “cold, hard cell”. A beam of moonlight shines through a window on her face, and shows a “single tear” rolling down her cheek, “like a liquid diamond”.

It’s not a bad image, but that’s all it really is: a somewhat overwrought image (see the description of the Single Tear, for instance) of a woman in a cell, which could work as a metaphor, but doesn’t work nearly as well when it’s supposed to be an actual person. Also, given that the only woman we have seen captured is Arya the elf, I think I can say without spoiling very much that this is indeed her. I think that illustrates what I just said quite well, too; we see Arya again, and all we learn is that she’s alive, she’s imprisoned, and she’s sad, all of which we could have guessed for ourselves, so… what’s the purpose of this, other than to show that Eragon’s having visions again?

To be fair, I do note that Arya’s cell has moonlight shining in. In the self-published edition, Eragon has this vision at night, but because of the change of plan, he now has it (according to the next chapter) shortly before sunset. So… let me check if that would work. By my reckoning, the place where Arya is held is about 182 kilometres further east, which (assuming they are at 30 degrees north latitude) means she is some 1,9 meridians to the east… which means that her time is 8 minutes ahead of Teirm’s time. If I’m being generous, that might mean that the sun is setting with her, not that the moonlight would be the only light. I am not going to complain too much about this, since it might as well have come from the previous day, given what we’ll learn about where these visions come from, but still:

PPP: 816

Let me also check if the phase of the moon checks out… Yes, it does! The full moon would have been on the 2^nd of February, and now it’s two days after that, so there should be plenty of moonlight available. Congratulations on getting that right, Paolini!

A thing that does bug me is that Arya has a cell with a window in it; even if she’s captured and probably watched, it could still make for a possible escape route or a way to talk to people outside, something that doesn’t seem to be addressed at all. Even though it’ll be a while before Durza’s back, he’s already not impressing me.

Ill Logic: 67

Well, Eragon wakes up after this vision, “crying uncontrollably”, and then “sink[s] back into a fitful sleep”. I can get him crying like that, since dreams can certainly have such an effect, and the vision is indeed sad… but why does he immediately fall asleep again? Like, he’s just had an intense dream, he finds himself crying and he can’t stop it, and then he just shrugs it off and sleeps? I really doubt that he could do that, or even that he’d want to, considering he’s only taking an afternoon nap before the expedition in this edition. Even in the original, where this was in the night, I’d still expect him to stay awake for a while, waiting for himself to calm down before he can sleep again, and probably trying to make sense of the vision. But instead, he can apparently fall asleep again at once.

PPP: 817

HISC: The self-published edition does say that Arya’s image “haunts him”, so it might just be a fault of this one… but on the other hand, there is a scene break immediately after, which implies that Eragon falls asleep, so maybe not.

Fumurti: Either way, that’s the end of the chapter!

Protagonist Unconsciousness: 10

And that’s once again the favourite way to end a chapter so far. As for this particular chapter, there just isn’t much to it. Most of it is (and was) summary of Eragon’s week spent learning reading and writing, with nearly all of the process skipped over. Beyond that, we get a bit of Saphira, a bit of further trouble, Eragon’s thoughts about wanting to stay in Teirm, and a rather random vision of Arya, which should all have been considerably fleshed out. I also think the discussion of the plan should have been kept, because of the insight into Jeod it gives us. And yes, that would mean that there would be several thousand more words, but removing Angela and pruning “An Old Friend” should have made up for that.

I also noticed that the severe cutting and pasting in this chapter caused quite a lot of errors, along with making it very slight. It doesn’t help either that what little this chapter does show us makes no sense for the most part. Well, whatever this chapter may have been, we can finally put the plan in motion and so get back on track to go after the Ra’zac again! See you next time!

A Better Commando Name	28
A Murder In Your Future	2
Abuse Count	121
All the Isms	17
Cardboard Worldbuilding	15
Continuity Contradictions	2
Did Not Do The Research	119
Edgy Equals Mature, Right?	9
For the Good of the Cause	35
Forgot the Narrator	61
FYRP	63
Give Me a Piece of Your Mind	4
History-Rewriting Narrator	7
Ill Logic	67
IYES	48
Like Coins Bounced Off a Drum	4
Morals for Thee But Not for Me	76
No-Wave Feminism	70
No Touchy	11
Olympic Finals in Conclusion Leaping	18
Petty Ain’t the Word for You	80
PPP	816
Space-Time Hairball	15
Thou Art Well Come	5
Cliffhanger Chop	2
Mid-Scene Break	6
Other Ending	9
Protagonist Unconsciousness	10
Single-Purpose Chapter	7