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i_read_whatSo last time, Keely's flight home was interrupted by a familiar face with some terrible news!
The chapter starts with Keely telling us about Niall and how, nowadays, he's not a very emotional or demonstrative man. Keely admits that a Mujhar has to put a lot of thought into what he says, or suffer the consequences. This is, I regret to say, why I think Keely would be a terrible Mujhar. As I've seen very little evidence of thought at all.
Sorry, sorry, I'm being mean.
Anyway, Keely notes that she'd expected Niall to be happy to see Taliesin, but instead, Niall seemed to know at once that something happened. And indeed, Taliesin explains to us:
"I was wrong," he said. "I thought he would not look so hard for us, nor so close; we have been safe in the cottage for years. Under his very nose . . ." Taliesin sighed, dismissing it consciously. "He came, with others, to our cottage. He said he had grown weary of my interference, of my service to the House of Homana in place of the House of Darkness." Something twisted his face briefly. "That is what he called it: the House of Darkness. Ruled by Asar-Suti, with Strahan as his regent."
"Or his heir?" My father rubbed the flesh of his brow beneath the leather strap. "My sons believe Strahan fully expects to trade humanity for god-hood, That he serves not so much out of a genuine conviction, but out of greed, out of ambition . . . out of perverse intent to assume a place of his own in the pantheon of the Seker."
Taliesin stared at him. Slowly the color drained from his ageless face. "He—would not ... he could not, unless—" He stopped.
a) I really wish, at some point, someone had asked Taliesin why they were hiding so close to Strahan. My own fan wank is that Ihlini can detect each other (at least if they were ever sworn to Asar-Suti), and that by hiding so close, Taliesin is masking his own less powerful aura by Strahan/Valgaard's own. That is just a wild guess though.
b) The whole "Strahan wants to be a god" thing was introduced in Corin's part of Pride of Princes, and honestly I don't really see the point of it. He's already a scary dude. What difference does it make if he wants to ascend to godhood or not? Also, a lot of this is conjecture.
Really, it's an awful lot like the whole "will we lose the lir when the prophecy concludes?" question. It's out of nowhere, based on very little established fact, and utterly pointless in the long run. Sorry for the spoiler.
Anyway, Taliesin contrasts Strahan with Tynstar, giving Tynstar more retroactive characterization than he ever got in the books where he was alive:
"Not that," he said. "It was not what his father wanted. Tynstar wanted Homana. He said it was his birthplace, but denied him by the gods who cast the Ihlini out into another land, while saving Homana for the Cheysuli." His eyes were stark. "Do you see? Tynstar wanted revenge. Power, aye—how else to effect revenge?—but mostly he wanted Homana. To spit at the gods themselves."
I'm not sure how consistent that is with Song of Homana, honestly. Tynstar was controlling Bellam, sure, and eventually killed him when he was no longer useful, but we never really saw him rule Homana himself. But I do like the differentiation of Ihlini motives. Tynstar wants his homeland, Strahan wants godhood (I guess), Lilith and Rhiannon want to control the prophecy.
But still:
My father's voice was steady. "But Tynstar's son wants it all. Strahan wants everything. How better to spit at the gods than to make himself one of them?"
"Reward," Taliesin said. "His reward for destroying the prophecy, for keeping the Firstborn from power."
"Godhood?" Deirdre drew in a breath. "How can it be clone? A man made into a god?"
"Power," the harper explained. "There are two kinds, lady: the power of a king—a strictly temporal tiling—and the power of the earth. Power absolute, tapped by those who know how. The Cheysuli know, a little . . . so do the Ihlini. But Strahan knows more than most, being liege man to the Seker." Frowning, he shook his head. "A two-fold threat to us all, I think—if Strahan destroys the prophecy, his reward will be godhood . . . but in order to destroy it, he may need godhood now." Taliesin closed his eyes. "Who can say what will happen? Who can say what can?"
So here's my problem with this speculation. Godhood is a fine and dandy motive, which nicely differentiates Strahan from what came before. But how does this fit with his actual behavior?
If destroying the prophecy is what gets him godhood, why would he have bothered trying to torture or subvert the boys at all? Why not just murder them? It'd be more of a step toward that goal. What possible advantage does he have in controlling the boys?
Controlling the boys makes sense for Tynstar, who wants to rule Homana and thus having a puppet king would do that. But Strahan?
Also, how do they know this? Taliesin, I guess, as a bard is a reasonable source of Ihlini folklore information, but did he read this or just conjecture? He seemed shocked at the idea.
Though I suppose, unlike Teirnan, Roberson at least tries to make Taliesin's belief understandable:
Taliesin looked at his hands. "I am a harper," he said slowly, "and harpers know these things. Harpers hear these things; old ones hear everything." Now his hands were trembling. "The lord I served was Tynstar in the halls of Valgaard itself; how could I not hear things? How could I drink the blood of the god without comprehending what I did, and what was left to do?" He steadied his voice with effort. "Like Corin, I overcame it. Like Corin, I suffered for it. But I never thought it would come so far; that Strahan could want so much."
My father's eyes did not waver. "Can it be done, Taliesin? Or is this a harper's tale, made of style instead of substance?"
The ageless face was old. "Anything can be done with the blessing of the Seker. Am I not proof of that?" He sighed. "Nearly two hundred years old."
They ask how Caro died. And this is a bit silly:
"Strahan put his hand upon him."
The Mujhar swung around. "He did no more than that?"
"Nothing more was required. A man grows old, and he dies."
My father was taken aback. "Aye, over a span of years."
Taliesin shrugged. "With Strahan's hand upon him, a moment was all it took."
Not the death part, that's sad. But this is literally what happened to Carillon. Ian even references that "there are stories that Tynstar stole twenty years from Carillon". Um, Roberson, why are we acting like Carillon's life is a long ago fable, that people forgot the details of?
Carillon was Niall's grandfather. Niall is forty now. If he'd lived, Donal would only have been sixty-three. There are people who likely have living memory of Carillon being twenty and then being forty in the span of a night.
But then, this is a series that set the mythic Cheysuli rule of Homana as being four hundred years before present day.
Niall is not stupid though, he knows how tricky Strahan is, so, rather gently, he confronts Taliesin. Basically asking why Caro was killed and Taliesin left alive. He admits, he doesn't think Talisin would willingly betray them, but Strahan is very powerful.
Taliesin doesn't take offense. He reminds them instead of his story: how Strahan had mangled his hands and stole his ability to play the harp. And hey, canon confirmation:
The harper's voice was unsteady. "Now, again, he takes, if only to punish me for the services I have done you. Killing is too easy, too transient for me ... he wants me to live forever, knowing myself alone." With effort, he stilled his hands. "He killed Caro," he said. "He killed the man I loved."
So...canon confirmation finally. I really wish Roberson had said it in Track of the White Wolf, if only because Niall's reaction to Varien would have been more clearly a reaction to Varien himself, rather than a response to a man hitting on him. And well, it'd have been nice to have them appear as cavalry all canonically gay.
It's still a good reveal, I suppose, but I wish it happened before Caro got killed off.
Also this bit is odd:
Ian made a sound. Startled, I glanced at him, thinking him unsettled by Taliesin and the truth of his preferences, which are unknown within the clans. But he did not look at the harper. He was looking out the casement into the bailey beyond.
A) I sincerely doubt there are no gay Cheysuli. I can buy Keely's too dumb to notice.
B) Ian even TELLS Keely in an earlier chapter that he's neither celibate nor inclined to sleep with men, so he totally knows what homosexuality is, Keely.
But what he's reacting to is something else:
Is what?" I frowned, went to Ian's casement, stared out. Commotion raged below: horses, litters, bodies, shouting. "Who—?"
And then I saw the face upturned to my own, showing white teeth in a grin. A dark face framed by raven hair, with gold glinting from one ear.
"Hart," my father said disbelievingly. "By the gods, it is!"
Deirdre looked at him over her shoulder. "Were you expecting him?"
"No. No message ever arrived."
"By the gods," I said crossly, "does he require an invitation?"
And then I was gone from the solar, running down the hallway. Gods—I wish it was Corin—
But Hart would do well enough.
Poor Taliesin, his grief is upstaged by a prior main character arrival.
Also Keely, you're kind of a brat.
--
So anyway, how is Hart?
"No, no," he demurred, "I have not come seeking coin, not from the Homanan treasury." His grin was warm and wide, self-mocking as well as winsome; he could charm the maidenhead from an oath-bound virgin, and she not regret it. "Why should I? I have the Solindish treasury now, and the jewel of Solinde as well."
"Well, no doubt you will wager it." I grinned again, intensely pleased, and shook my head at him. "Have you wagered away your title?"
"I am reformed," he explained solemnly, but the glint in his eyes was pronounced. Sky-eyed, silk-tongued Hart, born but moments after Brennan and yet so very different. "Now I only wager the allowance Ilsa gives me, which is little enough, I fear." He sighed. "She is a termagant."
Pretty much Hart. I appreciate the attempt to show character growth here, though I feel like it's an awfully easy fix for a pretty rough real world problem. But if Hart can keep it under control, good for him.
And Ilsa's here too. And Keely decides to be dramatic about this whole deal:
Hart, smiling, turned automatically, moving just enough to leave my view unobstructed. I saw Ilsa getting out of a cloth-swathed litter, settling lavender skirts over the tops of white-dyed slippers. And again, as had happened more than a year before, I was struck by the magnificence of her. Ice-eyed, pale-haired Ilsa, whose beauty was legendary. A manifest incandescence.
We are not twins, Hart and I, as he and Brennan are, but we are closely linked by blood, and as closely bound by emotions. I looked from Ilsa to him, sensing instinctively he was no longer the man I had known. It had nothing to do with rank or race—he was the Prince of Solinde, now in fact as well as title—nor to do with the realization all over again that he lacked his left hand. No. It was a consuming and focused intensity directed solely in Ilsa’s direction.
He had married her for Solinde. He had gotten considerably more. Much more, I think, than he knew; certainly more than expected.
DID he marry her for Solinde? Pride of Princes seemed to try to convince us it was a love match. It does make SENSE for Solinde though. And well, maybe I did miss Hart a little.
Rael tells Keely that what she's sensing is happiness and the elation of satisfaction in his life.
Keely is surprised by this:
The hawk's comment surprised me. Hart's life before had not been so bad, though filled with the inconstancies of wagering and a clearly defined reluctance to assume personal responsibility for anything else at all, least of all his title. Hart had always been supremely good-natured, untouched by Brennan’s solemnity or Corin's moodiness. He had been, I had believed, the most satisfied of us all even when he had very little.
Now, in eminent clarity, he had more than any of us.
I guess I can't blame Keely for not noticing that Hart was falling through the cracks any more than I can blame her for not noticing how cruel she's being to her very-apparently-stable oldest brother. I could wish she would take that lesson to heart (pun unintended) and try to learn better.
But they're not alone: Ilsa's got a baby with her. Hart's surprise for Niall, indeed.
Per Ilsa, Hart is "a fool" for her, and mothers her to the point where you'd think Hart birthed her. I admit, their dynamic is pretty great. And well, I kinda get the sense that Hart is really more trophy husband than reigning monarch (or technically viceroy). But I think they're probably both happier that way.
Keely notes that Ilsa's accent isn't as strong and wonders if Hart's Solindish has gotten better, as his Homanan and Erinnish have always been superb.
Keely, please don't remind me that Niall apparently didn't make his son learn the language of the land he's supposed to govern.
He starts to ask about Brennan, but everyone else arrives. Interestingly Ilsa asks Keely if there's a place to be private. She's also got the baby's wet nurse, by the way. Which I'm glad to see. Since I was always bewildered why they never came up before. (Aislinn was around to take care of Niall, sure. But who fed Isolde after Sorcha's death? Who fed Aislinn?)
Keely muses about the past: how the accident led to everyone getting punished, leading to capture and torture, and all the changes each character suffered.
Keely watches the baby get changed and then nurse, wondering about the wet nurse's apparent contentment, wondering how she can like it when it's not even her baby. Ilsa notes the interest and asks if she wants to hold the baby when she's done nursing.
Keely does NOT.
Instead, she wants to project onto Ilsa now:
"Did you want her?" I asked abruptly, heedless of the others.
Ilsa looked at me in shock. "Did I—? Of course I wanted her! How could I not?"
"Did you want her?" I repeated. "Not because you hoped for an heir—no need to speak of that to me but because you desired a baby . . . for yourself as well as for Hart, the throne, the title . . . were you willing to let your body be used so simply to bring a child into the world?"
Ilsa's not Aileen though. And I kind of love her for it.
"You will hold this child," she commanded. "You will hold this tiny girl who is the flesh and bones and spirit of all our ancestors, and then you will tell me there is no room in your heart for compassion, for love, for empathy, for awe and tenderness . . . even, I know, for fear, because fear is what every woman feels." She thrust the baby into my arms. "You will hold her," she said fiercely, "and I promise, you will know."
I recoiled as far as I dared. "Ilsa—I beg you—"
"Hold her," she said. "Do you think you are the only woman in the world who believes she cannot want a child?"
I mean, as a childfree person, I don't think every woman will change her mind once she has one of her own. But I appreciate Ilsa being more aggressive to Keely's obnoxiousness.
The chapter ends with Keely stuck holding a tiny baby. And indeed "knowing". Something. Okay then.
The chapter starts with Keely telling us about Niall and how, nowadays, he's not a very emotional or demonstrative man. Keely admits that a Mujhar has to put a lot of thought into what he says, or suffer the consequences. This is, I regret to say, why I think Keely would be a terrible Mujhar. As I've seen very little evidence of thought at all.
Sorry, sorry, I'm being mean.
Anyway, Keely notes that she'd expected Niall to be happy to see Taliesin, but instead, Niall seemed to know at once that something happened. And indeed, Taliesin explains to us:
"I was wrong," he said. "I thought he would not look so hard for us, nor so close; we have been safe in the cottage for years. Under his very nose . . ." Taliesin sighed, dismissing it consciously. "He came, with others, to our cottage. He said he had grown weary of my interference, of my service to the House of Homana in place of the House of Darkness." Something twisted his face briefly. "That is what he called it: the House of Darkness. Ruled by Asar-Suti, with Strahan as his regent."
"Or his heir?" My father rubbed the flesh of his brow beneath the leather strap. "My sons believe Strahan fully expects to trade humanity for god-hood, That he serves not so much out of a genuine conviction, but out of greed, out of ambition . . . out of perverse intent to assume a place of his own in the pantheon of the Seker."
Taliesin stared at him. Slowly the color drained from his ageless face. "He—would not ... he could not, unless—" He stopped.
a) I really wish, at some point, someone had asked Taliesin why they were hiding so close to Strahan. My own fan wank is that Ihlini can detect each other (at least if they were ever sworn to Asar-Suti), and that by hiding so close, Taliesin is masking his own less powerful aura by Strahan/Valgaard's own. That is just a wild guess though.
b) The whole "Strahan wants to be a god" thing was introduced in Corin's part of Pride of Princes, and honestly I don't really see the point of it. He's already a scary dude. What difference does it make if he wants to ascend to godhood or not? Also, a lot of this is conjecture.
Really, it's an awful lot like the whole "will we lose the lir when the prophecy concludes?" question. It's out of nowhere, based on very little established fact, and utterly pointless in the long run. Sorry for the spoiler.
Anyway, Taliesin contrasts Strahan with Tynstar, giving Tynstar more retroactive characterization than he ever got in the books where he was alive:
"Not that," he said. "It was not what his father wanted. Tynstar wanted Homana. He said it was his birthplace, but denied him by the gods who cast the Ihlini out into another land, while saving Homana for the Cheysuli." His eyes were stark. "Do you see? Tynstar wanted revenge. Power, aye—how else to effect revenge?—but mostly he wanted Homana. To spit at the gods themselves."
I'm not sure how consistent that is with Song of Homana, honestly. Tynstar was controlling Bellam, sure, and eventually killed him when he was no longer useful, but we never really saw him rule Homana himself. But I do like the differentiation of Ihlini motives. Tynstar wants his homeland, Strahan wants godhood (I guess), Lilith and Rhiannon want to control the prophecy.
But still:
My father's voice was steady. "But Tynstar's son wants it all. Strahan wants everything. How better to spit at the gods than to make himself one of them?"
"Reward," Taliesin said. "His reward for destroying the prophecy, for keeping the Firstborn from power."
"Godhood?" Deirdre drew in a breath. "How can it be clone? A man made into a god?"
"Power," the harper explained. "There are two kinds, lady: the power of a king—a strictly temporal tiling—and the power of the earth. Power absolute, tapped by those who know how. The Cheysuli know, a little . . . so do the Ihlini. But Strahan knows more than most, being liege man to the Seker." Frowning, he shook his head. "A two-fold threat to us all, I think—if Strahan destroys the prophecy, his reward will be godhood . . . but in order to destroy it, he may need godhood now." Taliesin closed his eyes. "Who can say what will happen? Who can say what can?"
So here's my problem with this speculation. Godhood is a fine and dandy motive, which nicely differentiates Strahan from what came before. But how does this fit with his actual behavior?
If destroying the prophecy is what gets him godhood, why would he have bothered trying to torture or subvert the boys at all? Why not just murder them? It'd be more of a step toward that goal. What possible advantage does he have in controlling the boys?
Controlling the boys makes sense for Tynstar, who wants to rule Homana and thus having a puppet king would do that. But Strahan?
Also, how do they know this? Taliesin, I guess, as a bard is a reasonable source of Ihlini folklore information, but did he read this or just conjecture? He seemed shocked at the idea.
Though I suppose, unlike Teirnan, Roberson at least tries to make Taliesin's belief understandable:
Taliesin looked at his hands. "I am a harper," he said slowly, "and harpers know these things. Harpers hear these things; old ones hear everything." Now his hands were trembling. "The lord I served was Tynstar in the halls of Valgaard itself; how could I not hear things? How could I drink the blood of the god without comprehending what I did, and what was left to do?" He steadied his voice with effort. "Like Corin, I overcame it. Like Corin, I suffered for it. But I never thought it would come so far; that Strahan could want so much."
My father's eyes did not waver. "Can it be done, Taliesin? Or is this a harper's tale, made of style instead of substance?"
The ageless face was old. "Anything can be done with the blessing of the Seker. Am I not proof of that?" He sighed. "Nearly two hundred years old."
They ask how Caro died. And this is a bit silly:
"Strahan put his hand upon him."
The Mujhar swung around. "He did no more than that?"
"Nothing more was required. A man grows old, and he dies."
My father was taken aback. "Aye, over a span of years."
Taliesin shrugged. "With Strahan's hand upon him, a moment was all it took."
Not the death part, that's sad. But this is literally what happened to Carillon. Ian even references that "there are stories that Tynstar stole twenty years from Carillon". Um, Roberson, why are we acting like Carillon's life is a long ago fable, that people forgot the details of?
Carillon was Niall's grandfather. Niall is forty now. If he'd lived, Donal would only have been sixty-three. There are people who likely have living memory of Carillon being twenty and then being forty in the span of a night.
But then, this is a series that set the mythic Cheysuli rule of Homana as being four hundred years before present day.
Niall is not stupid though, he knows how tricky Strahan is, so, rather gently, he confronts Taliesin. Basically asking why Caro was killed and Taliesin left alive. He admits, he doesn't think Talisin would willingly betray them, but Strahan is very powerful.
Taliesin doesn't take offense. He reminds them instead of his story: how Strahan had mangled his hands and stole his ability to play the harp. And hey, canon confirmation:
The harper's voice was unsteady. "Now, again, he takes, if only to punish me for the services I have done you. Killing is too easy, too transient for me ... he wants me to live forever, knowing myself alone." With effort, he stilled his hands. "He killed Caro," he said. "He killed the man I loved."
So...canon confirmation finally. I really wish Roberson had said it in Track of the White Wolf, if only because Niall's reaction to Varien would have been more clearly a reaction to Varien himself, rather than a response to a man hitting on him. And well, it'd have been nice to have them appear as cavalry all canonically gay.
It's still a good reveal, I suppose, but I wish it happened before Caro got killed off.
Also this bit is odd:
Ian made a sound. Startled, I glanced at him, thinking him unsettled by Taliesin and the truth of his preferences, which are unknown within the clans. But he did not look at the harper. He was looking out the casement into the bailey beyond.
A) I sincerely doubt there are no gay Cheysuli. I can buy Keely's too dumb to notice.
B) Ian even TELLS Keely in an earlier chapter that he's neither celibate nor inclined to sleep with men, so he totally knows what homosexuality is, Keely.
But what he's reacting to is something else:
Is what?" I frowned, went to Ian's casement, stared out. Commotion raged below: horses, litters, bodies, shouting. "Who—?"
And then I saw the face upturned to my own, showing white teeth in a grin. A dark face framed by raven hair, with gold glinting from one ear.
"Hart," my father said disbelievingly. "By the gods, it is!"
Deirdre looked at him over her shoulder. "Were you expecting him?"
"No. No message ever arrived."
"By the gods," I said crossly, "does he require an invitation?"
And then I was gone from the solar, running down the hallway. Gods—I wish it was Corin—
But Hart would do well enough.
Poor Taliesin, his grief is upstaged by a prior main character arrival.
Also Keely, you're kind of a brat.
--
So anyway, how is Hart?
"No, no," he demurred, "I have not come seeking coin, not from the Homanan treasury." His grin was warm and wide, self-mocking as well as winsome; he could charm the maidenhead from an oath-bound virgin, and she not regret it. "Why should I? I have the Solindish treasury now, and the jewel of Solinde as well."
"Well, no doubt you will wager it." I grinned again, intensely pleased, and shook my head at him. "Have you wagered away your title?"
"I am reformed," he explained solemnly, but the glint in his eyes was pronounced. Sky-eyed, silk-tongued Hart, born but moments after Brennan and yet so very different. "Now I only wager the allowance Ilsa gives me, which is little enough, I fear." He sighed. "She is a termagant."
Pretty much Hart. I appreciate the attempt to show character growth here, though I feel like it's an awfully easy fix for a pretty rough real world problem. But if Hart can keep it under control, good for him.
And Ilsa's here too. And Keely decides to be dramatic about this whole deal:
Hart, smiling, turned automatically, moving just enough to leave my view unobstructed. I saw Ilsa getting out of a cloth-swathed litter, settling lavender skirts over the tops of white-dyed slippers. And again, as had happened more than a year before, I was struck by the magnificence of her. Ice-eyed, pale-haired Ilsa, whose beauty was legendary. A manifest incandescence.
We are not twins, Hart and I, as he and Brennan are, but we are closely linked by blood, and as closely bound by emotions. I looked from Ilsa to him, sensing instinctively he was no longer the man I had known. It had nothing to do with rank or race—he was the Prince of Solinde, now in fact as well as title—nor to do with the realization all over again that he lacked his left hand. No. It was a consuming and focused intensity directed solely in Ilsa’s direction.
He had married her for Solinde. He had gotten considerably more. Much more, I think, than he knew; certainly more than expected.
DID he marry her for Solinde? Pride of Princes seemed to try to convince us it was a love match. It does make SENSE for Solinde though. And well, maybe I did miss Hart a little.
Rael tells Keely that what she's sensing is happiness and the elation of satisfaction in his life.
Keely is surprised by this:
The hawk's comment surprised me. Hart's life before had not been so bad, though filled with the inconstancies of wagering and a clearly defined reluctance to assume personal responsibility for anything else at all, least of all his title. Hart had always been supremely good-natured, untouched by Brennan’s solemnity or Corin's moodiness. He had been, I had believed, the most satisfied of us all even when he had very little.
Now, in eminent clarity, he had more than any of us.
I guess I can't blame Keely for not noticing that Hart was falling through the cracks any more than I can blame her for not noticing how cruel she's being to her very-apparently-stable oldest brother. I could wish she would take that lesson to heart (pun unintended) and try to learn better.
But they're not alone: Ilsa's got a baby with her. Hart's surprise for Niall, indeed.
Per Ilsa, Hart is "a fool" for her, and mothers her to the point where you'd think Hart birthed her. I admit, their dynamic is pretty great. And well, I kinda get the sense that Hart is really more trophy husband than reigning monarch (or technically viceroy). But I think they're probably both happier that way.
Keely notes that Ilsa's accent isn't as strong and wonders if Hart's Solindish has gotten better, as his Homanan and Erinnish have always been superb.
Keely, please don't remind me that Niall apparently didn't make his son learn the language of the land he's supposed to govern.
He starts to ask about Brennan, but everyone else arrives. Interestingly Ilsa asks Keely if there's a place to be private. She's also got the baby's wet nurse, by the way. Which I'm glad to see. Since I was always bewildered why they never came up before. (Aislinn was around to take care of Niall, sure. But who fed Isolde after Sorcha's death? Who fed Aislinn?)
Keely muses about the past: how the accident led to everyone getting punished, leading to capture and torture, and all the changes each character suffered.
Keely watches the baby get changed and then nurse, wondering about the wet nurse's apparent contentment, wondering how she can like it when it's not even her baby. Ilsa notes the interest and asks if she wants to hold the baby when she's done nursing.
Keely does NOT.
Instead, she wants to project onto Ilsa now:
"Did you want her?" I asked abruptly, heedless of the others.
Ilsa looked at me in shock. "Did I—? Of course I wanted her! How could I not?"
"Did you want her?" I repeated. "Not because you hoped for an heir—no need to speak of that to me but because you desired a baby . . . for yourself as well as for Hart, the throne, the title . . . were you willing to let your body be used so simply to bring a child into the world?"
Ilsa's not Aileen though. And I kind of love her for it.
"You will hold this child," she commanded. "You will hold this tiny girl who is the flesh and bones and spirit of all our ancestors, and then you will tell me there is no room in your heart for compassion, for love, for empathy, for awe and tenderness . . . even, I know, for fear, because fear is what every woman feels." She thrust the baby into my arms. "You will hold her," she said fiercely, "and I promise, you will know."
I recoiled as far as I dared. "Ilsa—I beg you—"
"Hold her," she said. "Do you think you are the only woman in the world who believes she cannot want a child?"
I mean, as a childfree person, I don't think every woman will change her mind once she has one of her own. But I appreciate Ilsa being more aggressive to Keely's obnoxiousness.
The chapter ends with Keely stuck holding a tiny baby. And indeed "knowing". Something. Okay then.
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Date: 2024-09-25 05:07 pm (UTC)= Multi-Facets.
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Date: 2024-09-25 05:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-09-27 03:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-09-25 08:26 pm (UTC)Well, I'm not surprised Strahan "wanting godhood" goes nowhere, since it doesn't seem to actually impact what he does (and so it can't give insight, either).
Good to see that we have a confirmed gay character, I'd say!
I also get the feeling the pacing works much better in this chapter.
no subject
Date: 2024-09-27 03:59 am (UTC)