Mister Monday: Chapter Eighteen

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Chapter Seventeen | Table of Contents | Chapters Nineteen and Twenty

Vermaanti: A good day, everyone, and welcome back to Mister Monday! Last time, Arthur escaped the Clock-Marchers and he talked a bit with Pravuil. We are also slightly over two-thirds in and the actual action of the book has yet to happen. At least it will happen now?

We open on Arthur and Pravuil going to the Old One’s clock again. Pravuil hangs back and then stops completely. He says he would rather stop here, while “[keeping] his head bowed and [] avoid[ing] Arthur’s gaze”. The Old One can be “a little bit tetchy”, after all, though he naturally won’t be for Arthur. Arthur gets suspicious, since Pravuil was not afraid to go closer earlier.

He asks what the Old One will do to Pravuil. Pravuil evades. Arthur presses him about what things the Old One does, and what he does not like. Pravuil says that the last time he came near the clock, the Old One threatened to pull of his head and “kick it over the rim of the pit”. In that case, he would be worse off than Bareneck, since he’d never find it. (He’d probably die quite soon, from what we see, so…)

Arthur asks why, since the Old One was quite friendly to him. Pravuil explains that that is because Arthur is a mortal and the Old One does not like Denizens. Yes, we knew that already, thank you. The Old One apparently said he especially doesn’t like Pravuil for a reason he can’t fathom, so he’d rather wait here. You’re really transparent, Pravuil.

Arthur says he can do that. He is sure Pravuil is “up to something”, but he does not have time to argue and it is useless to get him closer. And once Arthur knows how to use the Improbable Stair, he won’t need Pravuil any more… He does remind Pravuil of his promise to serve him. Pravuil “brightly” says that “a chap couldn’t forget that” (why are you talking like this?). He still doesn’t look at Arthur, though he says he stands by his words and wishes Arthur good luck.

Arthur nods and sets off for the Old One. He is in his “thinking position” near the numeral two. Arthur sees he can’t move beyond “the first quarter of the clock” yet. Arthur slowly approaches. He is glad to see the doors are shut again, though he only has Pravuil’s word that the Clock-Marchers are indeed gone. As Arthur steps onto the clock face, the Old One looks up. His eyes “[are] red, but they [are] there”. Oh, that is good! If the Old One didn’t still have “splashes of dried blood” on his cheeks, Arthur would doubt that the Old One ever had his eyes taken.

He greets the Old One. The Old One inclines his head “in what might be a very restrained greeting”, but does nothing further. Arthur gets nervous, and remembers how the chain around his neck felt. He doubts that his head could be reattached. Yes, maybe you could have waited some longer…

He slowly walks to the Old One, and says he came back to see if he’s decided to help or not. The Old One said he wouldn’t need much time to think on it, and then the Clock-Marchers came… The Old One “growl[s]” that he deliberated for too long and almost let them have Arthur instead. If he had stayed on the clock “for another second”, they would have, too. Well, Arthur was quite lucky indeed, then!

Arthur “restrain[s] his anger” at this, and says they took someone else’s instead. He asks why the Old One did not wake him earlier. The Old One says he wanted to test himself, to see if he could let Arthur pay terribly for a night’s rest. In the end, it turned out he couldn’t, and he’s pleased with that. We’ve already seen this, naturally, but I do like that we see him tell Arthur about it. …Naturally, we now also learn he did it specifically to test himself.

Well, he says that Arthur has “earned some answers”. He may ask just three questions, and he’ll answer. (Finally some answers!) Arthur almost asks why only three questions, but he stops himself because he is sure that would count as one, too. The Old One says he may begin, and Arthur gets two minutes, according to “the hand of this clock”. I guess he could get quite some information from that, though he’d need to think very quickly. Arthur does just that and then asks how he can “use the Improbable Stair to get to Monday’s Dayroom from here”. Yay! We’ll finally be getting out of here!

The Old One explains that the Stair “exists everywhere there is somewhere to exist”. Arthur needs to imagine a stair where there is none, one made from whatever he can see, “be it a grass stem broken in three places or a peculiar step-shaped cloud”. Then he needs to jump toward the first step while holding the Key in a hand. If you believe the Stair is there, it will be, at least “for the wielder of the Lesser Key”. Ooh, I like this! Going by the later books, Arthur could probably make the Stair directly with the Key, but now he needs to find it via a complicated way, and I know that we’ll get a sequence of that soon.

Once he is upon the Stair, he needs to keep going until he arrives at his destination. The Stair has “many landings”, and on each of them, it might be necessary to find the Stair again. If you don’t find the continuation quickly, you’ll be stuck “wherever and whenever you stopped”. This has bothered me for quite some time, really. Why couldn’t you just make another stair and start all over again? In fact, Arthur manages to do this at the beginning of Lord Sunday. True, he’s got much more power than now… but it still feels weird that the Stair would “remember” who’s been on it.

Well, the Stair goes through all of the Universe, in both time and space, and through the House, so he should watch out, because it’s “possible to end up somewhere you particularly do not wish to be”. That’s even likely, as it’s “part of the Stair’s nature”. It takes “strength of will” as well as power to reach your destination. Arthur should also look out for other travellers, like Nithlings who sometimes manage to get on.

That was quite enlightening, nonetheless! At this moment, the minute hand moves, and Arthur realises he’s lost an entire minute. I checked, and that’s sensible, though the Old One would have had to speak quite slowly. Arthur now asks how he can use the powers of the Lesser Key. He holds it up, and it flares a bit, though the light is drowned out by that of the chains.

The Old One says the powers of the Key are “numerous”, and in the hands of its rightful wielder, it can do almost anything. It is “generally weaker in the House than in the Secondary Realms”, though, and it may be opposed. Oh, this is nice! As we’ll learn later, the Keys are weaker in domains that aren’t their own (which I guess makes sense?), and that means that the Lesser Key will indeed be weaker in the greatest part of the House. I thought our first reference to this was in Sir Thursday, but apparently it was already an idea here!

In general, the Key can be used to “lock, unlock, bind, unbind, open, close, animate, petrify, illuminate, darken, translate, befuddle, and to perform small diversion or redirections of Time”. This isn’t even the full powerset of this Key, and already it’s very powerful! Even if this were the only things he could do with it, I don’t doubt he’d come quite far to defeating Monday just by applying these powers smartly.

The Key will protect him from “physical and psychic harm” to some degree, though, since Arthur is mortal, there are “close limits” on this. Finally, Arthur already knows how to use it. There are thirty seconds left. …Not unless the Old One spoke ­really fast just now. Arthur confirms this is true, though he’s sure he hasn’t used that much time. He tries to think of a question that might give a better answer than the last two. “Something more direct, more straightforward.”

The Old One says he cannot tell, as the Universe is forbidden to him and it has been very long since he has last looked. Arthur may ask another question, though. So Arthur asks who he can trust. The Old One says those who “wish [him] well”, not those who’d “use [him] well”, and he should be “a player, not a pawn”. And with that, the time is up. That doesn’t fit well, either, so I think 40 and 20 seconds for the second and third questions would be better.

The Old One waves Arthur away. Arthur keeps his ground, though, (as the Old One waves him away again) saying that it’s not really an answer, and who can he trust specifically? The Old One now gets up, makes a loop with one of his chains, and flicks it in the air. Arthur still keeps standing, looking up at the Old One with the Key in his hand. He thinks it’s “just like standing up to a bully”, and that is has to be done, even as he feels “very shaky inside”.

The Old One says he needs to decide for himself who to trust, and starts to wave Arthur away, but he decides to tell Arthur “one more thing”. That’s this:

A mortal who wields the Key will become its tool as much as it is his. It will change you, in blood and bone, remaking you in the image of its maker. The Key does not befit a mortal bearer. In time, it will remake its wielder. Think carefully about that, Arthur. To wield power is never without cost. As you can see here.

Yes, this will be quite relevant in the later books. It’s a bit redundant, sure, but I still like it. Arthur can hardly abandon the Key now… but if he will become the tool of the Key, that will hardly help either. It’s just a pity we see very little of this in the next two books.

The Old One tells him to go now, and jumps after him, swinging his chain. Arthur ducks and runs to the coal pyramids. When he is there, Pravuil is nowhere to be seen. Arthur looks back and see the Old One sitting in his thinking pose again. Arthur thinks that he needs to some thinking himself, though his first thought is to use the Improbable Stair to get out of “this freezing, dusty pit”. But it isn’t so simple. Should he use the Stair when there might be other ways, for example? And where should he go? To the Dayroom, to try claiming the Hour Hand? (That wouldn’t even work, since he doesn’t know what the Dayroom is like, and it would be frankly suicidal.) And what about the Will, Suzy, and Dusk?

Thinking of Dusk makes him wonder if Pravuil has a way to communicate with Dusk. What has Dusk told him to do beside helping Arthur and giving him tea? So he calls out for Pravuil. His shout echoes around, but there comes no answer. He calls again for Pravuil to come, but no answer. He thinks “[s]o much for swearing loyalty”. He really broke his word easily, didn’t he?

He then wonders if he can reach Pravuil’s camp, as he can use some hot drink, even if Pravuil isn’t there. But, since he didn’t leave markers, he knows it’s not use. He’d only stumble upon it by “blind good luck”. Still, I like that he’s willing to try. It’s quite a contrast with how he was earlier in the book, I think.

Arthur calls out again, but there is nothing. As he prepares to shout yet again, he hears “[a] faint noise that [is] hard to pinpoint”. As Arthur sticks a pyramid together with the Key and climbs up, it gets louder. The light from the Key spreads out as he gets higher, but he still cannot see anything. (I think this illustrates quite well how much more active Arthur gets to be. Now he can stick a coal pyramid together, when earlier he wasn’t even sure how to lock a door.) He now recognises the sound as the beating of wings, and someone is “coming straight down towards him”! Oh, exciting!

Arthur jumps out of the way as the being flies over his head. As he hits the ground, he hears it crash into another pyramid, sending coal all around. He thinks it’s obviously someone who doesn’t know “how to fly properly”. Before whoever it is can recover, he runs over, “the Key held ready to strike”. He does not think it is Dusk, since he saw that the wings looked white, and he somehow doesn’t think Dawn, Noon or Dusk would be so clumsy.

A “familiar voice” says that it was “a facer and no mistake”. Arthur stares at “a blackened shape” that crawls out of the coal, and she says no one told her the ground could come up so fast. Well, flying in such darkness is quite different than flying in light, so I’m not surprised that it didn’t go well. Arthur recognises the figure as Suzy. Good to see her back! He puts the Key away and helps her up, asking how she got here.

Suzy says the Will took over “a careless Third Secretary in Charge of Ceiling Maintenance” and gave her the Secretary’s wings. She stands up “shakily” and brushes some of the coal dust off. She still has the wings, though they’re “quite bent at the top” (I’d hope they hold), and they’re almost completely black. She says that the Will sent her to find Arthur, though it wouldn’t come itself, because it couldn’t come near “some old geezer”. She was lucky to aim for the right light, and asks what the blue light is. (I also note that she sounds quite short of breath throughout this.)

Arthur says the light comes from the “old geezer”, and she’d better stay away. He asks if Noon let her go. She says that he sort of did, or, at least, they evaded them to begin with. She finds it quite cold down here, and says Arthur could better read the message she has with her, because then they can leave.

She pulls out and “envelope of thick buff paper”, sealed with wax that’s “imprinted with what look[s] like a frog’s handprint”. Naturally the Will would spend the effort on something like sealing the letter properly even in such a situation. (rolls eyes) Well, Arthur tears it open. It takes a moment to find that the writing is on the inside of the envelope, like “an old-fashioned aerogram”. The letter is beautifully written in “faintly glowing green ink”.

The Will opens by addressing Arthur, and naming him as “Master of the Lower House, the Middle House, the Upper House, the Far Reaches, the Great Maze, the Incomparable Gardens, the Border Sea” and the Universe. Then they greet Arthur, naming themself “Paragraphs Three to Seven” of the Wil, and saying it’s been brought over by hand of Suzy, “Ink-Filler, etc, etc.” (Yes, Suzy doesn’t have very much titles yet.)

The Will goes on to warn Arthur away from the Old One for a paragraph (too late), and calls him “Sir”. They say they regret Arthur’s “temporary incarceration”, but their plans are “still in motion”. They suggest Arthur comes at once to “Monday’s Antechamber”, as the actual Dayroom is probably too well-defended and needs “close examination” before they can go on. The Will then says they’d thought of bringing wings along for Arthur to get to the Antechamber, but using them is difficult, and they “feared an accident”. It is “[b]etter and more fitting” that Arthur should use the Improbable Stair.

Arthur now gets interrupted by Suzy saying she can’t get her wings off. He stops reading a description of the Improbable Stair that’s almost the same as the one the Old One gave, “as if it [comes] out of the same book and both the Will and the giant [have] memorised it”. Then maybe the Old One and the Architect are related more closely than the Old One said?

Well, Suzy’s reaching over her shoulder and struggling with a wing. Arthur asks if he can help. Suzy says he can’t and it feels like they’ve “grown into [her] back”. Arthur says his felt the same way, but they turned into paper just before he hit the ground. Suzy says “scornfully” that the paper wings are just “temporary, small magic”. Her own wings are “top-class” and “permanent”. She’s seen them be put on and off and changed in size, so there has to be trick for it. Arthur nods, thinking that she’s far from finding it, and reads on.

The Will says again he should use the Improbable Stair to get to the Antechamber, and that they’ve done “a small sketch” to help him visualise it. Then they warn Arthur of the dangers again. Arthur looks at the sketch. It’s about as large as his thumbnail, but “incredibly fine and detailed”, which he compares to a very old engraving. It shows the inside of a tent, with “piles of cushions and a small table with a very tall, thing jug and several wineglasses on it”. Arthur thinks it looks strange for an antechamber and goes back to reading.

If everything goes like expected, the Will will be there, with “whatever allies [they] can muster”. They’ll also reveal the rest of the plan there. They finally sign off by calling themself Arthur’s “obedient and respectful servant” (right), and with “May the Will be done”.

Arthur now folds the letter and puts it in a pocket. Suzy is still busy with her wings. He asks what the Will told her to do now. She gives up fighting her wings, and says she doesn’t know and she supposes she’ll come with Arthur. Arthur says he isn’t sure if she can come along. Suzy gets angry, and complains about having flown all the way down here and now Arthur can’t even be bothered to take her along.

So Arthur explains he’ll take her if possible, he just needs to get on the Stair and he’s not sure if both of them can come. He’s surprised the Will didn’t tell her. Suzy “mutter[s] [] darkly” that the Will only thinks of itself, and just went on about carrying out “the intentions of the Architect”. It drove her crazy, she says. She tells Arthur to get on with it, before “Noon’s goons” catch up with her.

After some misunderstanding, Arthur asks after them. It was easy to lose the “first lot” Noon sent after them from the Efficiencer General’s office. So… I guess they left the office as soon as Noon left and the Commissionaire Sergeant posted there reported that. Noon only heard about it when he got back from the Coal Cellar, and I guess Suzy already had wings by then? Either way, shaking off the first lot would have been quite easy, given that they would barely know where to look. (Maybe you should have looked for the Will better, Noon?)

Well, when she reached the “Upper Cellar”, there were quite some Commissionaires on watch around the edge. She got past them, but she’s sure some of them have got wings by now. They’d better move on, as they’d might not be able to hurt Arthur, but they can certainly hurt her.

Arthur now looks up. At first he can’t see anything, but when he moves the Key away, he can see “faint lights above” that weren’t there before. The lights also grow brighter while he watches. Suzy says they’re “[w]atch lanterns”, and she thinks they’re probably half a dozen Commissionaire Sergeants. Arthur is just about to say something when there is an “angry roar” behind them, so loud that Suzy instinctively clutches her hat. We’re told that the Old One has also noticed the Commissionaires. Then it’s about time to leave.

Arthur holds out his left hand and tells Suzy to take it. She does so “reluctantly, holding it as she might a dead rat, with only two fingers”. (Why, really?) Arthur tells her to hold on better, or she’ll certainly be left behind, so Suzy does so. Arthur has some doubts about whether he can take her along, and if he can even find the Stair, but then he decides to focus on what he’s been told. I like that, too!

We get what they said, that he needs to focus on something that looks like steps and believe the Stair will be there. He imagines it like this:

There in the darkness above that slightly slumped pyramid, Arthur thought. That’s where the Stair will be. It will just continue on from the natural steps of coal that have formed where the side of the pyramid has slipped.

Yes, he thought. A broad stair, leading straight up. Steps of white marble, gleaming in the darkness. He could see it clearly in his head, but was it there in that dark space?

I’ve shared it in full because I just love how Arthur is creating the Stair by simply believing in it.

Well, one of the Commissionaire Sergeants tells them to stop where they are, but it is faint and “still some distance away”. The Old One shoots a bolt of lightning, but that rebounds “as if it [has] hit a glass ceiling only a hundred yards above” the clock. Well, little wonder that the Architect put that up. I also wouldn’t be surprised if that’s how far out the coal pyramids begin.

Arthur ignores both of them. He can now actually see the shining steps of the Stair and all he has to do is jump on… Then we cut to Suzy’s POV, as Arthur jumps ahead without warning. Her wings flap to keep her aloft as Arthur jumps into the air near the pyramid, but doesn’t land on coal. Instead, he lands on something she can’t see, and he jumps again. Her wings beat harder, and she closes her eyes. He jumps again, and she closes them even tighter, anticipating a hard fall to the ground.

But there isn’t. Her feet touch something, “but not with the impact of a heavy fall”. She opens her eyes and looks down. Beneath her boots, there is “[w]hite marble”. She looks around, and, apart from the stair “climbing straight ahead”, she can only see “blazing white light” everywhere. So they’ve made it to the Improbable Stair! (I just find it neat that Arthur believing in it made it real for Suzy, too.)

Arthur tells her to look at the steps, and to go with him, because they must not stop. There the chapter ends.

Well, that was great! We’ve finally let the Coal Cellar behind (and just in time, too!), Arthur finally gets to do something about his situation, and there’s finally a better pace! It also helps, I think, that we see Suzy again and hear back from the Will, because we can go on with the main story now. Now Arthur can go on to confront Monday, which is clearly where the book is headed. Further, it’s just nice to know we’ll be seeing different environments after several chapters in a very dull one.

Overall, I think the rest of the book should be much better to do. Until chapter 22!