Mister Monday: Chapter Twelve

[teres]

Chapter Eleven | Table of Contents | Chapter Thirteen

Vermaanti: A good day, everyone, and welcome back to Mister Monday! Last time, we had a quite large infodump, because the information in this book is not divided very well. This time, we find out just what Arthur is supposed to do.

 

 

The last chapter ended with the elevator nearly reaching the office of the Efficiencer General. Arthur grabs the handrail as the elevator abruptly slows and judders, which threatens to throw Arthur and Suzy around. I thought elevators were supposed to slow down before they reach their destination, but this one is apparently not. The elevator goes smoothly for a bit longer, and then stops altogether, this time “successfully sending Arthur and Suzy against the walls and floor”. Ouch. The Will, being a frog, stays on the handrail.

 

Arthur, not surprisingly, gets up a little slower than Suzy, who’s already opening the door. He expects to see an office like the ones they ran through earlier, “all dark wood, green baize and gaslights”. But, at what “he [sees] instead”, his mouth hangs open. We get a paragraph of description of the interior.

 

He can see a “shaded grove of very tall, very thick-trunked trees”. In their midst is a “roughly trimmed lawn”, with the remains of a campfire in the middle of it (presumably Suzy’s creation). A small, “beautifully clear” stream cuts through a “corner” (?). A wooden bridge crosses it and continues as a “paved path” to an “open summerhouse”. This has “a desk, a lounge chair and some bookcases” in it. Suzy announces that they are in the office of the Efficiencer General.

 

That’s a very nice office, if I may say so! I’m also not exactly surprised at it. After all, I imagine the Efficiencer General, one of the people who would be in charge of combating the “laziness” in the Lower House, would have good working quarters. Further, I find it a nice touch that this “dream office” is so naturalistic, though I’d like to have actual animals in it to complete it.

 

Arthur and the Will go out after her. The elevator door closes after them and “an electric-sounding bell” sounds, which makes Arthur jump. He looks back and see the elevator is hidden in the trunk of one of the trees. Now the door is closed, he can barely see the outline in the bark “or the call button that [is] concealed in a knotted whorl”.

 

Arthur notes there’s sunshine, and points to the rays that come through the trees. He looks between two of them and sees “a distant vista of grasslands beyond, with blue sky above”. He says he can see the normal sky and asks where they are. Suzy says they’re still in the House, and everything outside the trees is like an “all-round window” which you can’t go through.

 

Arthur keeps looking, and he can see shapes move in the grass! Those are “[h]uge, reptilian animals. Prehistoric animals that he [has] seen in books and museums”. There aren’t grey like in “all the pictures”, but “pale yellow with faint blue stripes”. Arthur says there are “dinosaurs” out there! What a shock!

 

I do like that these dinosaurs are shown in colour, though I wonder why none of the pictures Arthur has seen are reflect that. Given how advanced this world is shown to be, I’d think the reconstructions would have changed, too.

 

The Will speaks up, saying that they cannot get in, and Suzy is right. There’s a “panoramic window” around the office, set to look at a particular place in the Universe. It’s “unusual” that it looks this far back, because the farther back it looks, the more unstable it is. I mean… if this office is so luxurious anyway, why not put in a luxurious window? (Still, it looks at least 65 million years back! Wow!)

 

Arthur asks if the window can look in the future, too, and if it’s possible to change where it looks to. The Will says it depends on “what [he] mean[s] by the future”, because there are many relationships between the House and “time in the Secondary Realms”. If Arthur means the future of the Earth, that is impossible, because it’s “closely in step with House Time”. I guess that’s due to the recent heavy interference from the House? They can look at every moment before Arthur came to the House, if they had the record for the window. It looks out on the Secondary Realms, so it’s part of it, and so, it has a record somewhere. Maybe it is even in the desk.

 

Hmmm, I do note from this paragraph that apparently no time has passed on Earth since Arthur came into the House? That’s great news, and it’s quite subtly done!

 

Arthur says it doesn’t matter, because he just wanted to check what is happening back on Earth, but if he can’t look in the future, he doesn’t want to. He also think it’s probably better not to see it, because it would only “feed the fear and tension inside him”. And he can’t do anything about it, either, so I doubt it would help him at all.

 

Suzy says she’ll start a fire, so they can have tea. Arthur says this:

 

We haven’t got time for tea! Arthur thought.

 

Well, I don’t “have the time” to listen to you talk all about the panoramic window, either. Yes, Arthur’s complaint is somewhat valid, but it might work better if this book hadn’t wasted lots of time already.

 

He decides not to say it, because he needs to wait on what the Will says anyway, and they might as well drink tea during that time. Suzy goes to the campfire and assembles “a small pyramid of black stones”. Arthur follows her. After a second, he realises that the stones are “pieces of coal”, which he’s never physically seen before. He notes that all the pieces are “exactly the same shape and size”, which he doesn’t think is normal. Well, then they’re obviously cut to size.

 

And… (sighs) Still 316 words to go before we get further explanation. Great. Well, Arthur doesn’t get the House, because why do they need “gaslights and coal fires and the old-fashioned clothes” and all? If the House is the epicentre of the Universe, why can’t it be done with magic? That would mean better clothes, at least.

 

Suzy says it’s “fashion”, which changes every so often, though she doesn’t know why. When it does, everything changes, but the basic stuff, like the “rotten jobs” and the clothes you can’t get, stay the same. She doesn’t really remember the last fashion, because it was “more than a hundred years ago” and she’s been washed between her ears so often. She does remember “having to wear a pointy hat”.

 

The Will exposits about the fashion that prevailed when they were locked up: “[r]obes and cow dung campfires and donkey carts up endless mountains instead of elevators”. Then the current fashion is much more practical, at least. Were these “endless mountains” removed in the meantime, by the way? That seems like a quite big modification. Also, where did those cows come from, then? Or was the cow dung made in the House without cows?

 

Anyway, the Will says that they think the Architect liked to take ideas from the Universe, “at least cosmetically”, and the current fashion is doubtlessly the work of the Trustees. Hmmm, of Monday, Tuesday, and Saturday, then, as the rest don’t really seem to care for the current fashion.

 

This gets Suzy to complaining about the clothing. Whatever the fashion, you can’t get clothing from the official supplies, so you need to get it from smugglers. But, for that, you need “House gold”, which is very hard to come by, or “something to barter”. Of course, the “big nobs” always have supplies of clothing and “tea and buttered scones” and such. And every now and then they lose “a bag of coal or a tea caddy”.

 

She winks and fetches a “battered, blackened teapot” from the summerhouse. She fills it with water from the stream and puts it over the coal fire (which we didn’t see her light) “on a tripod made from three bent pokers and some wire”. Riveting. She asks the Will (who she calls “froggy”) to explain what Arthur’s supposed to do. She sits down cross-legged and stares at the frog. Arthur lies on his stomach and puts his chin on his hands.

 

Now we finally get to the explanation!! The Will says that Arthur has the “Minute Hand” (with capitals), which is half of the Key that “governs the Lower House”. It’s less powerful than its complement, “the Hour Hand”, which Monday still has, but it’s still “faster to use and can be used more often”. So do you mean that it can be used more often in a specific time period or that it has more situations in which it’s useful? I’m quite sure it’s the second, but it’s still vague.

 

Also, why is the First Key divided like this, anyway? We don’t see this with any of the other ones… Oh, maybe Monday did this so one of his servants, like Noon, could do his tasks for him, while he himself still held part of the Key, too. That also makes sense with their power sets, then.

 

The Will goes on to say that Arthur knows the Minute Hand can “lock and open doors”, but it also has many other powers that “[they] will explain in due course”. What’s the problem with telling him now? He knows how to use the Key, after all. If you tell him what he can do, he could learn it very fast! But no, best keep Arthur ignorant so he’s easier to control. (rolls eyes)

 

The Will explains that they chose Arthur to be the Rightful Heir as “First Part of the Will”. The Minute Hand is only the first thing he is to inherit. His “immediate goal” is to get the Hour Hand and complete the Key. If he has that, it will be easy to defeat Monday and “claim the Mastery of the Lower House”. The “Morrow Days” (so the other Trustees) will protest to that, but under the agreement they forged with Monday, they won’t be able to intervene. Well, we already saw Saturday intervene in the prologue… so good luck with that.

 

As soon as Arthur has become Master, they’ll need to “put into train significant changes to the Lower House”, so they’ll have a “solid base” to free the rest of the Will from. Not because it will mean that the lives of everyone in the Lower House will become better, mind, just so they can free the rest of the Will. They say there is “tremendous slackness and stupidity” in the Lower House right now, and worst of all, “[they] believe[]”, interference with the Universe. My, would you think? There are only two people from out there in the House right now.

 

So Arthur needs to select a cabinet and his own “Dawn, Noon and Dusk”, of course… And why would he need to do so? What’s the problem with another form of government?

 

In general, the whole idea of Arthur ruling here seems very bad to me. To begin with, he’s only twelve years old and he’s never had any experience ruling before. He would need to learn quite a bit more before he could take on the rule of the entire Lower House! And even if he’d know how to rule, he still doesn’t know exactly which issues are at play and how best to solve them. Further, even if he knew that, he still isn’t exactly native to the House, so it would rather be a foreign power grab.

 

Of course, I think that the Will knows this, and just wants to use Arthur as a puppet ruler. Too bad that Arthur doesn’t like that.

 

Arthur now protests, saying that he doesn’t want to be the Master, he just wants to have a cure for the plague and take it to home. He just wants to know how to do that. The Will sniffs that they were discussing “grand strategy”, not “tactics”. Well, Will, you also need the tactics if you’re to get anywhere. They will try to answer Arthur’s questions, though.

 

I have to say that Nix is quite good at making the Will unbearably irritating, so kudos for that.

 

The Will then says… “Imprimis”. (looks it up) Ah, I see that that means “at first”. Good to see that I have to look up what the Will’s saying. Well, first off, Arthur needs to defeat Monday “in order to have any chance of doing anything”, including obtaining a cure for “this plague of yours”. I almost wish I would be there so I could clasp their mouth shut. That would be so satisfying…

 

I am happy to see confirmation that Arthur needs to do something about Monday, though, given how much he’s gone ignored the last few chapters.

 

Secondly, Arthur will have to sneak into Monday’s “aptly named Dayroom” to get the Hour Hand, which is Arthur’s own property. In fact, once Arthur gets in they Dayroom and calls for it with a spell that the Will will teach him, it will fly to his hand, “unless Monday is holding it at the time, which is unlikely”. Because it is just so far-fetched that Monday might know about this and hold the Key in his hand. Yes, I doubt that he would do that, but it’s still something to keep in mind…

 

What’s more, we’ve seen that Monday holds the Key close to him usually, and I can’t see Monday leaving the Hour Hand lying around now, so he’d be alerted immediately if Arthur called it to him. Further… we’ve seen that Monday only gave the Minute Hand to Arthur. The Hour Hand may be Arthur’s “lawful property”, but Monday still holds control over it. There’s no way this will go as smoothly as the Will says.

 

Arthur asks if there’s no way to get a cure without defeating Monday. The Will doesn’t answer the question, instead saying that “all manner of things will be possible” once he’s Master. For example, he can fully access the Atlas, which is “a repository of considerable knowledge”, and they expect that Arthur can find a cure for the plague in there. That’s true, at least. (There is a cure that can be used without the Atlas, though.)

 

Arthur protests that he doesn’t have the Atlas, because the Fetchers took it to wherever they went. The Will explains that the Fetchers were banished to the Nothing they came from. The Atlas went back to where it came from, too, which is “the ivory-faced bookshelf behind the tree fern in Monday’s Dayroom”. That means nothing when we’ve never seen in there, but I guess it’s true? Arthur further asks if there’s really no other way to do it. The Will says there’s not.

 

‘OK, if I have to do this, I have to do it,’ said Arthur.

 

Finally!!! We are literally halfway through the book and we finally know what Arthur is supposed to do! That has been a quite big problem so far. The first half of this book has been quite decent on its own, with a quick enough pace and enough tension and intrigue… but it didn’t have focus. At first it seems to be about the mystery of Monday and Noon and such, which isn’t a bad plot per se, but it was still mostly Arthur reacting to everything they threw at him.

 

Once we get to the epidemic, it suddenly becomes all about the epidemic, to the point that Arthur seems to forget that Monday’s even a thing, or that Monday and Noon caused it. And that sucks, because it feels like Arthur’s forgotten about the previous plotline! It also doesn’t help that the book, until now, hasn’t given us a concrete thing that Arthur can do about this, so we don’t have an idea where the story will go. For all we knew at the start of this chapter, Arthur might have got the cure and just returned home, while still being hounded by Monday and co.

 

Come to think of that, that also makes Arthur look supremely short-sighted. Like, he does realise that Monday won’t let him go until he has the Key back, right? And that Monday might even send another disease to Earth? It just makes him look like an idiot!

 

Well, at least the other half of the book is considerably better plotted. Let’s begin.

 

Arthur asks how he can sneak into the Dayroom. Come to think of it… I don’t really get what’s so “apt” about the naming? Either way, the Will says they haven’t yet “grappled with” that. You were literally in the Dayroom earlier! Why haven’t you thought about it yet? It’s kind of important! (sighs) They say there are “a number of possibilities”, including using “the Improbable Stair”, though that’s a last resort.

 

Just then, they stop, tilt their head and ask about a sound they hear. Oops… I do want to notice that this sentence refers to the Will as “he”, while they’ve been referred to as “it” until now, and will later use “she”. It just bugs me.

 

Arthur’s heard the sound, too. It’s a “distant roaring”. Hmm, what might that be? Arthur looks at Suzy, who says she doesn’t know. The only things she hears here are “the stream and the elevator bell”. The roaring sounds again, much louder and closer this time. And… let me just quote this, so you won’t be constantly interrupted by me.

 

In the gap through the trees, Arthur saw a yellow and blue striped monster that, apart from its colour, was very reminiscent of every Tyrannosaurus Rex picture he’d ever seen. The creature had to weigh several tons, was forty feet from head to tail and had teeth as long as his arm. It was coming directly at the office, roaring as it loped forward.

 

‘Uh, are you absolutely sure that can’t get in?’ asked Arthur. ‘How come we can hear it now?’

 

‘Monday,’ said the Will hurriedly. ‘He’s used the Hour Key and Seven Dials to connect that reality and this room. So it can get in, and so can Monday!

 

Oh, let me see…

 

• How can Arthur see all this through “the gap through the trees”? (Which I’d like more as “the gap between the trees”, by the way.) I thought they were in the middle of the lawn, so a single gap should be quite small.

• Please put some hyphens in “yellow and blue striped”.

• It’s not a “monster”! It’s just an animal like any other, and it’s not “evil” or something for attacking here.

• I doubt it looks like every Tyrannosaurus Rex picture he’s ever seen, as reconstructions tend to very quite a bit. I also like that his “futuristic” world still hasn’t figured out that non-avian dinosaurs weren’t all grey.

• And of course it’s a Tyrannosaurus Rex, because it’s not like a herbivorous dinosaur could try to trample them or something. It’s not that it’s bad, but it just feels so contrived that the Efficiencer General would have had the window specifically set to the time of the Tyrannosaurus Rex, especially when there is no reason the Denizens would see it as a “signature dinosaur”. It’s just a failure of worldbuilding, which is a pity, because Nix is usually better at it. I’m beginning to think the sequels are just plain better…

• The description is fine, though I wonder whose POV it’s in? It’s supposed to be Arthur’s, because he’s talking about “his arm”, but it has to be omniscient, because I really don’t see how Arthur could pick out all these details while looking through a gap between the trees.

• Why is the dinosaur running straight at the office? I guess they might see it as a threat (because there’s suddenly a group of trees) and try to attack it? That should have been clearer, though.

• Well, Arthur, I think that the fact that the dinosaur is reacting to the presence of the office is more of a tip-off than being able to hear them.

• Why would Monday use the Seven Dials? After all, only Sneezer can use them and why would Monday let Sneezer at the Seven Dials now? Also, we don’t ever see the Seven Dials used to connect different time periods like here. Why would he need them, either way? The Will said earlier that this window was “unstable”, so why couldn’t he have made it break down with the Hour Hand.

• Yes, Will, Monday can come in. In fact, he could also use the elevator, instead of going to Earth first and then walking in.

 

That load of nitpicking aside, I just don’t get why Monday would do this. Yes, it might have worked if the panorama window opened somewhere more lethal, like somewhere underwater or on another planet than Earth, and then it would have been a fair bet to try to expose them to it. But this… well, it’s a plain with Tyrannosaurus Rexes. They might be lethal, but Arthur, Suzy and the Will might as well have time to hide. And, if they truly didn’t want to be found, they might as well flee into the plains, which would make them a pain to find. It’s just such a ridiculous thing to do!

 

It just feels to me like Nix thought this was cool to put in and didn’t think about how it would fit in with the rest of the book. The result just sucks, and it will keep going for a bit, too.

 

I do like one thing about it, namely that Arthur can’t ignore Monday and such any longer. He didn’t think about how Noon would be searching after him earlier? Well, now they now where he is and are taking action!

 

(shakes self) Back to the story. The Will says they must “flee to fight another day” and Arthur shouldn’t give up the Key “freely”. And then they jump right into the stream. Well, goodbye and good riddance, especially since you left Arthur and Suzy behind for Monday. Suzy almost thinks to jump in, too, but she then runs for the elevator and presses the call button. Arthur follows, drawing the Key out.

 

A few seconds “after he’[s] crossed the footbridge”… Wait, he never did that! Only Suzy went to the summerhouse and came back. They were both lying on the lawn! Where was the editor here?! Well, the “huge yellow dinosaur” (yellow with blue and plain yellow are very different colours, Nix) crashes through the trees, then, “sending splinters flying”. That’s troublesome. Also, why are there only “splinters”? Not branches or leaves or anything? Whatever.

 

The dinosaur, with its “beady eyes”, focuses on the smoke coming from the fire and plunges forward, “roaring and biting”. ...What for? Then it stands in the fire, never mind that that doesn’t fit with biting at all, and roars in pain. It goes into a frenzy, “biting and smashing at the smoke and the summerhouse with its bony head”. I… just don’t get how the dinosaur went from biting at the fire to standing in it. Given how big they are, that should have been noticeable for Arthur and Suzy, and I think the dinosaur would know better than to do so. It doesn’t make sense.

 

Arthur and Suzy are now crouched by the elevator door, close to the trunk. Suzy begins to reach for the call button again, but Arthur holds her back. And see this:

 

‘Don’t move,’ he whispered. ‘It thought the smoke was alive, so it must have rotten eyes and can’t smell. If we stay still it might go away.’

 

Good to see that Arthur finds this all so logical, because I don’t! First, a little search shows me that Tyrannosaurus Rex had very good vision and quite good smell. Oops! And yes, I know this might not have been known at the time this book was written, but it’s still simply not true! It’s also being used for a very stupid plot point, so I’m not inclined to be forgiving.

 

Also, how does thinking that the smoke is alive indicate that they have bad eyes and can’t see? Like, this dinosaur has never seen an arranged fire before, and this is an entirely new thing to them! You’re in the same situation, Arthur! What can I compare… If you’d seen the light shafts when you first went into the House and assumed they were living beings, would that mean that your eyesight is bad? Why can you make unsupported assumptions about magical things and have it be just that, while the dinosaur assuming things about magical stuff must be “bad senses”? Idiot!

 

On the topic of assumptions, how do you know the dinosaur thought the smoke was alive? Maybe they wanted to test it by biting in it. You don’t know!

 

On that last bit, I think the dinosaur would leave anyway, because they just stepped into the campfire, not just because of “bad eyes”. (sighs) Nearly done…

 

They watch in “silent horror” as the dinosaur tears the summerhouse down to the foundations, and smashes and bites the rest to bits. We’re told the dinosaur is “[f]urious at not finding anything edible”. Well, I’m quite sure Arthur and Suzy would count as edible, and the dinosaur can smell just fine, so this can’t be true! The dinosaur has also been burned by the fire, of course, so they give out “[their] loudest roar yet” and then crash back through the trees and disappear. Well, at least the dinosaur doesn’t have to be involved in this nonsense anymore.

 

Suzy says she’ll never come back and asks if it’s alright to move. Arthur “grimly” says no, because he’s just seen more movement where the dinosaur came through first. “A line of men” comes from the trees. Yep, they’re caught! No big surprise, given how little they’ve done to hide. After all, finding the Sergeant-Commissionaire that the Will left behind would have been easy, and I can imagine that Noon, for example, could have healed him. Then they would have heard about Suzy, and I think it might be well-known that she lives in the Efficiencer General’s office, so that’s where they’d send their troops first. And, because they didn’t think to hide, here they’ve been found out! Great!

 

We get a description of the men. Arthur thinks they look a bit like Fetchers, though these are “tall and skinny and somewhat more human-looking”, though “their eyes [are] red and sunken, and their faces thin and pallid”. They’re only wearing black, with black tailcoats and black ribbons around their (black) top hats. They all have “long-handled whips” that they hold in their “black-gloved hands”. Oh, they do look stylish!

 

Suzy identifies them as “Midnight Visitors”, with “nightmare-whips and night-gloves”. She also seems afraid of them. Well, good to see that she remembers where she lives again. I would like to know what the Visitors usually do, or which stories are told about them, to make them this feared.

 

Arthur quickly asks if there’s any other way beside the elevator to get out. Suzy says no, there might be a “weirdway”, but… Just then the elevator arrives. They “share[] a smile of relief”, then grab the door and slide it open so eagerly that it hits the tree. At that moment, there comes “a blinding flash of light”. Arthur and Suzy “stagger[] back” and fall on the lawn. And who is this…?

 

‘So here you are,’ yawned Mister Monday.

 

Yes, they’ve been found out by Monday himself and he’s here to get the Minute Hand back! And he even nearly knocked them out just with his entrance! Ahhhh, I love it.

 

Monday gets out of the elevator, a “shooting stick” in one hand and the Hour Key in the other. What was that again about it being “unlikely” that Monday would hold the Key in his hand? He yawns again, walks over to the lawn, then puts the shooting stick into the grass, unfolds it and sits down. That was Monday’s contribution, it seems.

 

Noon comes out behind him, “smiling his perfect smile”. Next to him is “a beautiful woman dressed all in pink and rose”. She looks like Noon’s sister and “so must be Monday’s Dawn”. Some paces further back is another “impossibly handsome man”, who looks like Noon’s brother. He wears “a coat of black dusted with silver”, which means he’s “Monday’s Dusk”. Well, good to finally see them!

 

We’re told that Monday’s “clearly taking no chances”. And that’s quite smart of him. I do like a competent villain. We’re further told he’s “gathered all his most powerful supporters”. Um, I think they’re working for him? Why are we being told this in omniscient? Behind them come “a rush of Commissionaire Sergeants”, a mass of ordinary Commissionaires and “a swirl of other less identifiable people”. Yes, “less identifiable” from the omniscient perspective. (rolls eyes)

 

Either way, they’re trapped well and good! That’s quite a problem. Monday snaps at everyone to hurry up, because he’s “exhausted”. Someone has to get the Minute Key and bring it to him. Dawn, Noon and Dusk just look at each other, and Monday says ‘I’m waiting!’ He really does come across as somewhat pathetic here, doesn’t he? Still, he’s smart, and he can easily prevent Arthur from getting at the rest of the Key…

 

Noon brings up the Will, and we see that he and his siblings carefully look around the office, and all three of them are prepared to draw weapons, “though no weapons [are] in sight”. We already know Noon, at least, can create weapons from nothing, Nix, and we don’t have reason to assume Dawn and Dusk can’t. Why is this necessary?

 

Monday says that the Will can’t face all of them, and he expects they’ve “already fled”. He tells the others to get on with it. Now that’s something I can get behind! On the subject of fleeing… I do note that the Will fled as soon as it became clear that the dinosaur was about to charge, when not even the Midnight Visitors were there yet. They didn’t bother to tell Arthur about the powers of the Key, either, though that would have been quite easy.

 

Also, spoilers, but this part will never get to really stand up to Monday like the other parts do. Yes, they attacked Monday as Sneezer, but it still isn’t the same… Well, Dawn, Noon and Dusk are still unwilling to act (which is quite sensible, frankly), but finally Noon calls on a Commissionaire to take the Minute Hand from Arthur. Ooh, more sense in sending a construct (?) first!

 

Arthur is still lying on the grass, “partially stunned by the blast”. Only his “fluttering eyelids and moving chest” indicate he’s still alive. Well, then I’m interested in what Monday exactly did to him to keep him like this for so long. The Commissionaire does as he’s instructed, with some flourishes, and stops a “pace short of Arthur”. Then he bends down and tries to get the Key.

We’re told it should have come loose easily, as Arthur doesn’t have “strength to hold it”, and he’s only “dimly aware” of what’s happening (what did Monday do to him?). But they Key doesn’t move, and it seems to be “glued to his palm”. Well, that’s interesting… The Commissionaire tugs at it, then goes to a knee and pulls harder. It still doesn’t come off. We get some input from Arthur, then, as he asks the Commissionaire please not to do it.

 

The chapter ends like this: ‘Rip his arm off,’ ordered Noon. ‘Or cut it off. Whichever’s quicker.’

 

Now that’s a good cliffhanger! And it’s nice to see Noon be quite pragmatic about it. If it succeeds, he has the Key, and at worst, only a Commissionaire has been lost. I do like him as a villain.

 

That was that, then! I see that it’s be far the longest review for this book yet, and quite a bit of it was given over to nitpicking. But at least it gets much better from here on. See you in chapter 15!