Eragon: Chapter Nine: Strangers in Carvahall (Part I)

[pangolin20]

Chapter Eight | Table of Contents | Chapter Nine (Part II)

Kerlois: Welcome back to Eragon, everyone!

Content Warning for discussion of child abuse

 

Before we begin, I would like to assign a point for the title of chapter eight. That reads “A Miller-to-Be” in the Knopf edition, with two capital letters in the same word. I think the latter one should not be a capital.

PPP: 206

Come to think of it, I will also put in yet another count for an issue that quite irks me: Not Like the Good Old Days.

Let me see… 20 points for Brom’s story about the Riders, 5 for his talking session with Eragon for the general tone… and 2 points for Galbatorix supposedly censoring stories.

Not Like the Good Old Days: 27

S Not Like the Good Old Days: 27

Also, I have now received a definite schedule for the rest of this book. Here it is:

Chapter 9	Strangers in Carvahall	Corneille Noire
Chapter 10	Flight of Destiny	Kerlois
Chapter 11	The Doom of Innocence	Corneille Noire
Chapter 12	Deathwatch	Corneille Noire
Chapter 13	The Madness of Life	Kerlois
Chapter 14	A Rider's Blade	Fumurti
Chapter 15	Saddlemaking	Kerlois
Chapter 16	Therinsford	Fumurti
Chapter 17	Thunder Roar and Lightning Crackle	Fumurti
Chapter 18	Revelation at Yazuac	Corneille Noire
Chapter 19	Admonishments	Corneille Noire
Chapter 20	Magic is the Simplest Thing	Fumurti
Chapter 21	Daret	Corneille Noire
Chapter 22	Through a Dragon's Eye	Corneille Noire
Chapter 23	A Song for the Road	Fumurti
Chapter 24	A Taste of Teirm	Fumurti
Chapter 25	An Old Friend	Kerlois
Chapter 26	The Witch and the Werecat	Fumurti
Chapter 27	Of Reading and Plots	Kerlois
Chapter 28	Thieves in the Castle	Corneille Noire
Chapter 29	A Costly Mistake	Kerlois
Chapter 30	Vision of Perfection	Corneille Noire
Chapter 31	Master of the Blade	Fumurti
Chapter 32	The Mire of Dras-Leona	Kerlois
Chapter 33	Trail of Oil	Fumurti
Chapter 34	Worshipers of Helgrind	Corneille Noire
Chapter 35	The Ra'zac's Revenge	Kerlois
Chapter 36	Murtagh	Fumurti
Chapter 37	Legacy of a Rider	Kerlois
Chapter 38	Diamond Tomb	Corneille Noire
Chapter 39	Capture at Gil'ead	Corneille Noire
Chapter 40	Du Súndavar Freohr	Corneille Noire
Chapter 41	Fighting Shadows	Fumurti
Chapter 42	A Warrior and a Healer	Fumurti
Chapter 43	Water From Sand	Corneille Noire
Chapter 44	The Ramr River	Kerlois
Chapter 45	The Hadarac Desert	Corneille Noire
Chapter 46	A Path Revealed	Fumurti
Chapter 47	A Clash of Wills	Corneille Noire
Chapter 48	Flight Through the Valley	Kerlois
Chapter 49	The Horns of a Dilemma	Fumurti
Chapter 50	Hunting for Answers	Kerlois
Chapter 51	The Glory of Tronjheim	Corneille Noire
Chapter 52	Ajihad	Corneille Noire
Chapter 53	Bless the Child, Argetlam	Fumurti
Chapter 54	Mandrake Root and Newt's Tongue	Corneille Noire
Chapter 55	Hall of the Mountain King	Kerlois
Chapter 56	Arya's Test	Kerlois
Chapter 57	The Shadows Lengthen	Kerlois
Chapter 58	Battle Under Farthen Dûr	Fumurti
Chapter 59	The Mourning Sage	Fumurti

With that out of the way, here is Corneille Noire!

(Corneille Noire, an anthro crow, comes in. They wear a long black cloak, and they have a scar across their right eye.)

Corneille Noire: A good day, everyone! I am honoured to be here.

Kerlois: You may begin, if you want to. Good luck! (leaves)

Corneille Noire: Thank you! Let me begin…

Chapter Ten / Nine: Strangers in Carvahall

Oooh, spooky… The strangers will be relevant, at least. And the main plot will get started. So that is something to look out to.

The chapter begins with the declaration that “Breakfast was cold, but the tea was hot.” Good to hear, I think. And good to see that they are drinking tea again.

Paoclichés: 12

S Paoclichés: 15

That is because this will happen very often in this series. We are told that ice inside the windows has “melted with the morning fire” and soaked into “the wood floor”, which stains it with “dark puddles”.

1) If they have a fire, why could they not warm their breakfast? Yes, it might be something that needs much warming, but a little description would help.

2) This seems like a prime way to have the wood rot away. In fact, why has that not happened yet after all these years? And why has none of them bothered to do anything about this? Great. Two sentences in and I already have this.

Connection Has Failed: 40

S Connection Has Failed: 46

Ill Logic: 102

S Ill Logic: 117

3) Should it not be “wooden floor”? I think that “wood floor” could also go here… but it still feels to me like Paolini is trying to use “wood” as an adjective here, which does not work.

In fact… there was also “wood table” back in chapter two, so I will count that, too.

PPP: 207

S PPP: 269

It is also the morning of the 18^th of December, by the way. Eragon looks over to Garrow and Roran, and “melodramatically” reflects that “this might be the last time he [sees] them together.”

That does not seem exactly “melodramatic” to me, given that the Empire might be after Saphira. As far as he knows, they might be killed soon. And given that, spoilers, this will be the last time he sees them together, it feels like some kind of clumsy attempt at foreshadowing… or rather more like a Dead Herring, given the “melodramatic” classifier. Allow me to explain in greater detail.

First, it does not exactly make sense for Eragon to think this, despite what I said above. We have not seen him be afraid of what the Empire might do in the last few chapters, after all. This feels like Paolini whispered this into Eragon’s ear for the sake of clumsy foreshadowing. And it is simply quite jarring and bad practice.

S PPP: 274 (Because this is quite bad)

As for the “melodramatic” part, it feels to me like an attempt to distract from this, to tell us that we should not pay attention to it. Except that this is actually what will happen, so this amounts to a Dead Herring.

S Dead Herrings: 81

This is our first one outside of Saphira’s egg, I see.

The Knopf edition improves on this, as “melodramatically” has been removed, and Eragon thinks instead that it will be “the last time he [sees] them together for many months”, which does fit with what he knows. It also helps with the tone this scene tries to set.

The self-published edition has some more stuff here. Eragon “stifle[s] a yawn” and shakes his head to clear out “the night’s vivid dreams” (not that we know what those are), and holds his “wool mitts” above the stove and puts them on. I am quite certain that should be “woollen mitts” instead of “wool mitts”.

S PPP: 275

He tells us that he “[is] dressed for outside”, though it makes him “too hot”. He thinks that he has time enough to be cold, as he stands closer to the stove. Also time enough to get a heat stroke, then. Yes, I am exaggerating, but this is still not a very good idea. He already says he is “too hot”, so I would advise him to step away from the stove. True, being cold would be uncomfortable, but if his clothes are worth their while, they should keep him warm all the way to Carvahall, and if he does not get overheated now, he also would not have to pull off clothing.

Ill Logic: 103

S Ill Logic: 118

Counted for both because there is no indication to the contrary in the Knopf edition.

Roran is sitting in a chair, “lacing his boots”, and he is also wrapped in heavy clothes. The Knopf edition deletes the last part.

His pack stands on the floor next to him. Garrow stands between Eragon and Roran, “with his hands stuck deep into his pockets.” His shirt hangs loosely and “his skin look[s] drawn.” We are told that despite “the young men’s cajoling”, “he refuse[s] to go with them.” Um, I am quite certain that Eragon is not yet considered a man yet. We were told that in chapter one.

Continuity Fluidity: 77

S Continuity Fluidity: 96

Then comes this: “When pressed for a reason, he only said it was for the best.” I do not exactly know what is going on here, either. I would expect there to be some kind of follow-up to this, but there is not. I could say that Garrow finds this hard, and would rather say his goodbyes at home, but that does not explain why Garrow does not say that.

As for an explanation… I am quite certain the reason he stays at home is because Paolini wants to have him give a farewell speech.

The Seams Are Showing: 38

S The Seams Are Showing: 40

Still, that does not explain why Garrow does not give a reason. The impression I get here is that Garrow somehow knows that he will die soon, and so it is for the best if he will give them a proper send-off. Which, again, he should not know.

PPP: 212

S PPP: 280

Not to mention that this is quite jarring and nonsensical anyway. It seems set up to give us a reveal later on, but that reveal simply never comes.

Connection Has Failed: 45

S Connection Has Failed: 51

Anyway. The self-published edition notes that Roran finishes tying his boots and stands up. It notes that Garrow looks at Roran as he asks him if he has everything. The Knopf edition only notes that Garrow asks this to Roran.

Roran says yes, at which Garrow nods and “[takes] a small pouch from his pocket.” He gives it to Roran and “coins clink[]” as he does so. A nice enough gift, I suppose. He says that he has been “saving this” for Roran. He says that it is not much, but if Roran “wish[es] to buy some bauble or trinket”, it would be enough. Um, I seem to recall that when the family visited Carvahall in chapter 3, Garrow also gave them money to buy frivolous things with. Why does Roran leaving to Therinsford merit as much money as going to visit the traders? Could he not give Roran a little bit more than that? He just comes off like a stereotypical miser here, which I am sure Paolini was not going for, but it is what he got.

Connection Has Failed: 46

S Connection Has Failed: 52

I also get the feeling that Paolini has forgotten the scene I just referenced.

Scales: You could rename Continuity Fluidity to Forgot Your Own Canon Again?. Credit for that one goes to gehayi, for her review of Grave Peril on anagnorisis_awakening.

Corneille Noire: I have not heard about that, but I will rename the count accordingly:

Forgot Your Own Canon Again?: 78

S Forgot Your Own Canon Again?: 97

Roran thanks him, and say he will not “spend [it] on trifles”. Garrow says, with a comma splice that the Knopf edition fixes, that he can do what he will, as the money is Roran’s.

S PPP: 281

He says that he has nothing else to give him except “a father’s blessing”. Roran can take that if he wishes, “but it is worth little.” Roran’s voice “[is] thick with emotion”, and he says that he will be honoured to receive it. The self-published edition has the comment about Roran’s voice as a dialogue tag.

S PPP: 282

Garrow tells him to do “and go in peace”, then kisses Roran on the forehead. So that was the blessing? Well, that was quick. He turns and says louder that he has not forgotten Eragon, and that he has words for the both of them. He says it is time that he said those, “as both of [them] are entering the world.”

*stiffly* They have been in the world all this time, Garrow, and in a quite awful part of it. Just because you have kept them isolated, it does not mean that their experiences are any less real.

Look Away: 318 (this book)

S Look Away: 325

He says that if they heed his advice, it will “serve them well”, and he gives them a stern gaze. Now, let us look at his advice:

“First, let no one rule your mind or body. Take special care that your thoughts remain unfettered. One may be a free man and yet be bound tighter than a slave.

Well, you did not exactly give Eragon and Roran much choice with that, now did you!? And that is immediately one of the main weaknesses of this advice: if they would find themselves in such a position, they would often not be able to refuse. And we will be seeing that time and time again in this series.

It is sound advice at its base, and this series will have situations where it applies (like in Brisingr, where Eragon lets himself be possessed for no adequate reason at all), but generally, it would not be something that one could actually act upon.

Also, how does Garrow know of this? Yes, he may have heard it from stories, but in that case, should Eragon not know it, too? And… when we are told about “mental combat” in chapter 31, Eragon does not act like he has heard this before. I will not mark this as a contradiction, but it would have helped to know where Garrow might have heard this from.

Missing Puzzle Pieces: 197

S Missing Puzzle Pieces: 198

Give men your ear, but not your heart.

…No. They would need at least some social bonds. True, they will not be able to trust anyone, but they can trust some people. The difficulty lies in finding out who to trust to what level, and saying that they should not trust anyone is absolutely ridiculous. What, should Roran keep himself isolated from Therinsford in the coming months? This also feels like more attempts at control, coming from someone who kept his children isolated for ten years.

But no, this is totally sage advice.

This Is Fine: 50

S This Is Fine: 55

Show respect for those in power, but don’t follow them blindly. Judge with logic and reason, but comment not.

Well, this is not too bad of an advice. Not that Eragon will be great at following it, but still.

~~~

“Consider none your superior, whatever their rank or station in life.

Also sound advice, though it seems a little out of place for this setting to me.

Treat all fairly or they will seek revenge.

…And you have lost me. Are you serious? “Only treat people fair because they might hurt you if you do not, and not do so because it is the right thing to do”? Great lesson to be teaching your children, Garrow.

This Is Fine: 51

S This Is Fine: 56

Be careful with your money. Hold fast to your beliefs and others will listen.” He continued at a slower pace, “Of the affairs of love…. My only advice is to be honest.

Little trouble here. The only thing is that I not care about is Garrow treating romance like it is something very special.

That’s your most powerful tool to unlock a heart or gain forgiveness.

I am lost once again, I fear. This seems very much like “honesty is most powerful way to make someone fall in love with you or make them forgive you”. Never mind that whether someone falls in love with you or forgives you should be their choice to make, not yours.

This Is Fine: 52

S This Is Fine: 57

Well, Garrow now says that he is done, and he seems “slightly self-conscious” of his speech. As he ought to be.

He pulls on Roran’s pack, and says that he must go now, as it is almost dawn, and “Dempton will be waiting.” Roran puts on his pack, which the self-published edition notes he does “thoughtfully”, and hugs Garrow. He says he will return as soon as he can.

Garrow says good, and tells him to go and not to worry about him or Eragon. They “part[] reluctantly”. Eragon and Roran go outside, and then wave. Garrow raises his hand, “his eyes grave”, and watches them walk to the road. “After a long moment”, he closes the door. At that, Roran stops.

And, in the self-published edition, we slip into his POV.

S Forgot the Narrator: 16

At least the Knopf edition fixed this. Anyway, Eragon looks back and “survey[s] the land.” He looks over the lone buildings, and notes that “[t]hey look[] pitifully small and fragile.” “A thin finger of smoke” coming from the house is the only proof that it is inhabited. Roran says sombrely that “[t]here is [their] whole world[.]” Um, I thought that Eragon goes into the Spine very often, and they go to Carvahall sometimes, so their world might be broader than that? Other than that, it just goes to show how messed-up their childhood has been.

The Knopf edition separates this last sentence into a separate paragraph. Eragon “shiver[s] impatiently” and says it is “a good one”, too. Well, since he has not known any other, I can see why he would think this.

Also, is Eragon shivering? He just nearly stood in the stove and is wrapped in layers of clothing! How can he be so cold that he is shivering now?! It just does not feel as if it is taking place in a coherent reality!

Forgot Your Own Canon Again?: 79

S Forgot Your Own Canon Again?: 98

Roran nods at that, then straightens his shoulders and “head[s] into his new future.” The house disappears behind them as they descend the hill.

And with that, we have officially left the first part of the novel, as the plot will finally start. It only took us 20007 words in the Knopf edition, and 25301 in the self-published edition, but we are there! And, frankly, most of what we went through until now is useless. Let me summarise the chapters until now:

Prologue: Durza ambushes Arya. Both will not be relevant until two-thirds of the book.

Chapter 1: Eragon discovers Saphira’s egg.

Chapter 2: Eragon has a run-in with Sloan and we meet Garrow.

Chapter 3: We hear about Selena, meet Roran, see Merlock, meet with the traders and hear Galbatorix’s backstory.

Chapter 4: Saphira hatches.

Chapter 5: A month passes as Eragon “raises” Saphira.

Chapter 6: Information about the Riders.

Chapter 7: Roran wants to leave for Therinsford and Eragon names Saphira.

Chapter 8: Two weeks pass as Saphira grows further.

I would not say there is enough plot here for eight full chapters. And the fragmented nature of this part does not help either. So far, it has consisted of scenes interspersed with bits of summary, which is a quite large difference from the rest of the book.

Come to think of it, I can easily point to a very large problem with this section: it is not about Eragon becoming a Rider, and the rest of this book is. And why did we need to spend all this time on the inhabitants of Carvahall when they will soon drop out of this book and will only come back in Eldest? Why bother to introduce Sloan and Katrina now, for instance, when they will only be relevant then?

PPP: 222

S PPP: 292

For that matter, did we really need all the padding up to now? Did we need to meet Merlock to tell us about Saphira’s egg? Did we need to meet the pro-Empire traders? Did we need to make such a big deal out of Roran leaving?

PPP: 232

S PPP: 302

But what bothers me most is that Eragon becoming a Rider is the B plot here. It only appears after several chapters, and when it is there, it has far less detail than the goings-on in Carvahall. Yes, Eragon does freak out when Brom tells him about dragons, but it does not stick, while his anguish over Roran leaving does. Even in the previous chapter, we switched to talking about Saphira by saying that “she was a balm to Eragon’s frustration”.

I would say that it is also very clear here, as there has not even been a mention of Saphira since the begin of the chapter. True, it is a moment between him, Roran, and Garrow, but should he not at least tell Saphira how it went or something like that?

What Dragons?: 248

S What Dragons?: 248

And also this, for actively ignoring the actual plot of this book for eight chapters straight:

PPP: 272

S PPP: 353

1 point per 500 words.

Anyway, from now on, we will have a (mostly) coherent story. So that is nice to know.

One last thing that bothers me is their family situation. So far, it has been quite clear that it is not going well and that Garrow is abusive. But at no point will Eragon and/or Roran realise this. It simply feels… insulting to have this go completely ignored.

Look Away: 338

S Look Away: 345

This Is Fine: 72

S This Is Fine: 77

Not to mention that it is very poor plotting.

Drop It Like It’s Hot: 32

S Drop It Like It’s Hot: 32

PPP: 292

S PPP: 373

Anyway. After the timeskip, they have reached Carvahall, while it is “still early”. Despite that, the smithy is already open. The air inside is nicely warm. Baldor is working “two large bellows” that are attached to the side of the forge, which is filled with “sparkling coals”.

Shine Bright Like a Diamond: 5

S Shine Bright Like a Diamond: 5

It has been a while, not that I mind it is back. Also, hi there, Baldor! This is the first time we see him in the Knopf edition, after all. We are told that before the forge, there is a “black anvil” and “and iron-bound barrel filled with brine water.” I am quite certain that should be just “brine”.

S PPP: 374

Indeed, the Knopf edition makes that change, and also swaps the positions of the descriptions. We are then told that a “line of neck-high poles protrud[e]” from the wall, with rows of items hanging from them: “giant tongs, pliers, hammers in every shape and weight, chisels, angles, center punches, files, rasps, lathes, bars of iron and steel waiting to be shaped, vises, shears, picks, and shovels.”

Yes, thank you very much for this laundry list. We absolutely need this to visualise the smithy. True, I think these things would not be out of place in a smithy, but it only amounts to padding here.

Get to the Point Already: 9

S Get to the Point Already: 20

Regardless, Horst and Dempton are there, too, standing next to a “hefty table.” The Knopf edition uses “long table” here.

Also, Baldor is nothing but a set piece in this scene.

Just Gonna Stand There: 3

S Just Gonna Stand There: 6

They see Eragon and Roran, and Dempton comes over “with a smile beneath his flamboyant red mustache.” He says he is glad that Roran came, as there will be “more work than [he can] handle with [his] new grindstones.” He asks if Roran is ready to go. The self-published edition notes that, in the background, Horst is wrapping the irons in canvas.

Roran hefts his pack, and says yes. He asks if they will leave soon. Dempton says that he will need to do some things first, but they can leave “within the hour”. He then turns to Eragon while tugging on his mustache. Eragon shifts his feet somewhat. Dempton says he must be Eragon, and that he would also offer him a job, but Roran got the only one. He says that “[m]aybe in a year or two” Eragon can get one, too.

I get the feeling that Dempton tries to lighten the mood here, but it is not exactly working for me, and clearly not for Eragon, either. Eragon just “smile[s] uneasily” and shakes Dempton’s hand. He notes that he is friendly, and “[u]nder other circumstances” he would have liked him, but at the moment, he resents him for coming to Carvahall “and plant[ing] the idea of leaving in Roran’s mind.” And yes, I can sympathise with Eragon’s resentment here; as far as he knows, he will now be all alone with Garrow for several months at least. The Knopf edition deletes the last clause, by the way.

Dempton “huff[s] behind his mustache” for some reason, and says it’s good. He turns to Roran and begins to explain how a mill works. Soon, Horst interrupts. He gestures at the irons and says that they are ready to go, and Dempton can take them when he wants to. Dempton answers, with a comma splice, that he will get them out of there soon.

S PPP: 375

Horst says, with another comma splice, that it does not matter, and that he can leave them there until he is ready to go.

S PPP: 376

The Knopf edition deletes this exchange, probably since it was quite pointless.

Well, Dempton and Horst shake hands, and then Horst leaves while beckoning to Eragon. Eragon gets interested and follows, “leaving Dempton and Roran engaged in conversation”, as the self-published edition puts it.

He finds Horst standing in the street, “with his arms crossed.” Eragon points back at Dempton and asks Horst what he finds of him. Horst says that he is “[a] good man” and that he will do fine with Roran. He brushes some “metal filings” from his apron, and then puts a hand on Eragon’s shoulder. Addressing him as “[l]ad”, he asks if Eragon remembers the fight with Sloan.

Um, why does Horst call him “lad”? When has he ever done this? It also does not help that a character will only be addressed like this six times in the entire series.

Connection Has Failed: 47

S Connection Has Failed: 53

In the self-published edition, Eragon thinks Of course I remember, but why should you? at that. Well, maybe because he got the chance to humiliate Sloan, like he said he wanted to? Or that you brought Saphira’s egg along? Or that it was only two and a half months ago, and not an exactly regular occurrence, so Horst remembering it is to be expected?

S Ill Logic: 119

Well, at least the Knopf edition got rid of this. Eragon says that he has not forgotten about paying for the meat, if that is what Horst meant.

Horst says that he trusts Eragon, and calls him “lad” again, with a missing comma in the self-published edition.

Connection Has Failed: 48

S Connection Has Failed: 54

S PPP: 377

He says that he wants to know if Eragon “still [has] that blue stone.” At this, Eragon’s “mind race[s] and his heart flutter[s]”. The Knopf edition deletes the first part. He wonders why Horst wants to know, and immediately thinks that someone might have seen Saphira. Ooooh, finally some excitement!

He “struggle[es] not to panic”, and says that he does, and asks why Horst asks this. Horst tells him to get rid of the “stone” as soon as he returns home. Um, why did Eragon just say he still had the egg? Why lie about that? Yes, it can be that he just made that up while panicking, but there is no indication of that, and I cannot see how that would give him away.

Ill Logic: 104

S Ill Logic: 120

Eragon apparently exclaims something at Horst saying this, but the latter overrides him and gives his explanation. He says that “yesterday”, “[t]wo men” arrived. Well, actually, as we will learn in Brisingr, they are brother and sister or, at least, “hatchmates”. But, of course, Horst assumes that they are both men, because he is not sexist at all.

No-Wave Feminism: 55

S No-Wave Feminism: 61

Yes, I am not exactly pleased that we will only learn their actual genders until two books from now.

He describes them as “[s]trange fellows dressed in black and carrying swords.” Well, they will probably be the titular “strangers”, then. Horst said it “made [his] skin crawl just to look at them.” Could these strangers be evil, maybe? Anyway, given how they will be treated later on, I will give it this:

RVMP: 43

S RVMP: 44

Horst explains that “last evening”, they began asking people if an egg like Saphira’s had been found, and today they are trying again. Eragon “blanche[s]” at that. Horst said that no one with any sense said anything, as “[t]hey know trouble when they see it”, but he “[can] name a few people who will talk.” Care to name them, Horst? That would be nice to have, come Eldest. Other than that, it is a nice misdirection, as Eragon will not, in fact, be discovered because someone talked about him.

Eragon gets very scared at this, so he does what he does best: hold an extended thinking session about this. He reasons that whoever has sent “the stone” to the Spine has managed to track it down. Um, why does he think about Saphira’s egg as “the stone”? He knows that it was her egg, after all. Yes, Horst referred to it as “the stone” just now, but that should not make him forget about that.

Forgot the Narrator: 14

S Forgot the Narrator: 17

He thinks, as a second option, that maybe the Empire has learned about Saphira. He does not know what will be worse. Cue some italicised thoughts. Eragon yells at himself to think. The egg is gone, and the strangers cannot find it now. But if they know what it was, “[it will] be obvious what happened.” He thinks that Saphira might be in danger. While I certainly appreciate his concern for her, I think that Eragon is in more danger right now. After all, Saphira is, well, a dragon, she can fly, and she is currently out in the Spine. Eragon would be easier to take on, he cannot flee so swiftly, and he is currently in the same village as the strangers. It stands to reason that he would be the one they would be after first. True, there are more people around, but they might still ambush him.

The self-published edition has some more thoughts. He thinks that if they are from the Empire, they will have to hide until they are gone. He is not sure what to do if they do not serve Galbatorix.

S PPP: 378 (“king” should not be capitalised)

Um, maybe hide, too? That seems like a good strategy to me anyway.

Ill Logic: 105

S Ill Logic: 121

He then decides that he “[has] to find out who they work for.” Why? To deliberately place yourself in danger? Why not ask Horst if he knows anything about this? What good will that information even do you at this moment?

Ill Logic: 106

S Ill Logic: 122

And it leads up to this:

It took all of his self-control to retain a casual air and say, “Thanks for telling me. Do you know where they are?” He was proud that his voice barely trembled.

Yes, he actually wants to seek out these strangers himself. He knows that they are bad news, he has no idea of what they might do to him, he knows that they are searching for Saphira, and that they might probably work for the Empire, and he chooses this. Yes, it comes a little less out of nowhere in the self-published edition, but it still does not work.

I barely know where to begin to unpack this… Well, first, why do you plan to go after the strangers alone? That is quite the worst thing you can do in this situation. Why not get Horst and some other villagers to back you up, so that you can try to find out who they are working for? Yes, it has to be set-up this way, so Eragon can meet the strangers alone, I know.

The Seams Are Showing: 43

S The Seams Are Showing: 45

Scales: Um, can I suggest a rename of this count to The Power of Plot Compels You! from the sporking of Chrono Cross by silais?

Corneille Noire: That is fine by me:

The Power of Plot Compels You!: 43

S The Power of Plot Compels You!: 45

I think that is also somewhat clearer.

Anyway, what in-universe reason is there for Eragon to want to do this alone? Other than his exceptionally poor decision-making? I could be fine with that, if it was acknowledged that he messed up here. Which it is not, for whatever reason. Even though many of his similar decisions will be acknowledged as such, this one will not, for no apparent reason.

Connection Has Failed: 49

S Connection Has Failed: 55

What makes this such a bad decision is that this is not necessary. Eragon might as well have decided to leave Carvahall via another route and accidentally walked into the strangers. There is no need for this contrivance!

Ill Logic: 111

S Ill Logic: 127

PPP: 297

S PPP: 383

On to my second point: Why does Eragon not want to show Horst that he is afraid? From the context, I get the impression that (somehow) showing Horst that he is afraid of the strangers will be a give-away that something unusual has happened with the egg. Never mind that being afraid is a perfectly natural reaction to being told that strangers who are obviously dangerous have come to Carvahall, and are probably looking for him.

I might be reading too much into it, of course, but it could do with more explanation regardless.

Ill Logic: 112

S Ill Logic: 128

And this is where I will stop for this time, as I am approximately halfway through this chapter. Until next time!