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i_read_whatSo last time, Duncan convinced Carillon to jump into a big hole to prove himself worthy of kingship. I'm not altogether sure why he bothered, because he basically proved himself worthy of kingship when he overthrew the guy who stole his kingdom. But sometimes masculinity is fragile.
So, we rejoin Carillon in the oubliette. It's a pretty surreal experience, as first, Carillon seems to fall without end, Duncan's words echoing around him. Then he feels himself being caught, suspended by something. He thinks it might be netting. It feels like a cradle. Carillon asks outloud if it's supposed to be like this, but Duncan isn't there to answer.
He starts to think he hears footsteps and whispers. He gets the sense that's floating. Then things get really weird.
For the record, it is really fucking hard to recap a hallucination.
Eventually though, the "feel like a Cheysuli thing" kicks in, and Carillon starts envisioning himself like a wolf. Like Storr: silver-coated, amber-eyed. With such grace as a man could never know.
I can't IMAGINE why that's where your brain went dude.
So Carillon feels himself shapechange and envisions the void. He thinks he understands it now, as a ward against the dazzled eyes of humans who saw the change. He also thinks: No man, seeing the change for what it was, would ever name the Cheysuli men.
And now, neither could I.
It would be kind of hilarious if this made him MORE antagonistic to Cheysuli rather than less.
Carillon feels himself back in the ropes. A man, not a beast. He shouts that Cheysuli phrase: Ja'hai, cheysu, Mujhar!
And then he hears someone call his name. He's pulled out of the oubliette by hands, supporting his head. He thinks its his mother, then realizes it's male:
“Jehan?” I gasped.
“No,” he said. “Rujholli. In this, for this moment, we are.” The hands tightened a moment. “Rujho, it is over.”
“Ja’hai—?”
“Ja’hai-na,” he said soothingly. “Ja’hai-na Homana Mujhar. You are born.”
BornBornBorn. “Ja’hai-na?”
“Accepted,” he said gently. “The king of all blood is born.”
Carillon realizes that he's Homanan again. But for four days, he'd been Cheysuli, his benefactor says. It will be enough.
Gradually Carillon's eyes adjust to the light and he sees a scar on his rescuer's face. It's Finn. Not Duncan.
Of course it is. Hahaha. Even DUNCAN's ritual can't not feel like a marriage ceremony to these idiots.
He slowly comes out of it, and well, just in case we forgot which characters are in this scene, we get:
I put up a hand to my own. I could not touch the color. They had been blue…I wondered now what they were. I wondered what I was…
“A man,” Finn said.
I shut my eyes. I sat very still in the darkness, knowing light only by the faint redness across my lids. I heard my breathing as I had heard it in the pit.
And pa-thump, pa-thump, pa-thump.
“Ja’hai-na,” Finn said gently.
“Ja’hai-na Homana Mujhar.” I reached out and caught his wrist before he could respond. I realized it had been the first time I had out-thought him, anticipating his movement. My fingers were clamped around his wrist as he had once clasped mine, preparing to cut it open. I had no knife, but he did. I had only to put out my other hand and take it.
For fuck's sake. I'm this close to suggesting that you find out if you can fuck in an oubliette.
Carillon makes a point of telling us how Finn doesn't move. He just waits, with Carillon holding his hand. Carillon asks about the shapechange. What it's really like. Finn lacks Homanan words, but Carillon asks for Cheysuli words. Sul'harai he says.
Carillon has heard the word before:
That I had heard before. Once. We had sat up one night in Caledon, lost in our jugs of usca, and spoke as men will about women, saying what we liked. Much had not been said aloud, but we had known. In our minds had been Alix. But out of that night had come a single complex word: sul’harai. It encompassed that which was perfect in the union of man and woman, almost a holy thing. And though the Homanan language lacked the proper words for him, I had heard it in his tone.
Sul’harai. When a man was a woman and a woman a man, two halves of a whole, for that single fleeting instant. And so at last I knew the shapechange.
So Carillon basically had a vision quest that now lets him understand Cheysuli sex. That's how I'm reading this.
Also, Carillon updates us with the ground breaking revelation that Finn is still hot:
Finn moved to the nearest wall and sat against it, resting his forearms on his drawn-up knees. Black hair fell into his face; it needed cutting, as usual. But what I noticed most was how he resembled the lir-shapes upon the wall, even in human form. There is something predatory about the Cheysuli. Something that makes them wild.
Thank you, Carillon. I was worried.
So Carillon asks when Finn came back, a question that makes Finn smile, as he deems it a "Carillon question" and thinks Carillon is recovered. (Meanwhile: Behind him was a hawk with open wings. The stone seemed to encase his shoulders so that he appeared to be sprouting wings. But no, that was his brother’s gift)
OH MY GOD.
Anyway, Finn came back two days ago to find the palace in an uproar over its missing king. Duncan finally told Finn what he'd done. I feel like Duncan probably should have considered what might have happened if Carillon didn't come back. It's not like the qu'mahlin is ancient history.
Finn himself had sort of known about the Womb:
“I knew it was here. Not where, precisely. And I did not know he had intended such a thing.” His brow creased. “He reprimanded me because I had risked you in the star magic, and yet he brought you down here and risked you all over again. I do not understand him.”
That's a completely fair complaint, IMO.
Carillon muses that Duncan might have been Mujhar instead of Carillon. Finn just shrugs, noting that what might have been doesn't matter, and that for a Cheysuli, being clan-leader is enough.
Finn also warns Carillon not to divulge anything. Carillon is Mujhar, not Finn, and the magic will be stronger if Carillon keeps it to himself.
They share a bit more mystic speak before Carillon realizes that he's gone for days without food. Fortunately, Finn comes prepared with usca. Which I imagine being like vodka. He says if Carillon wants real food, he'll have to get dressed.
For his part, Carillon realizes that, well, he'd lost control of his bodily functions in the oubliette:
“Gods,” I said finally, “I cannot go like this—”
Finn fetched the clothing, brought it back and began putting it on me, as if I were a child. “You are too big to carry,” he said when I stood, albeit wobbly, in my boots. “And it might somewhat tarnish your reputation. Carillon the Mujhar, drunk in some corner of his palace. What would the servants say?”
I told him, quite clearly, what I thought of servants speaking out of turn. I did it in the argot of the army we had shared, and it made him smile. And then he grasped my arm a moment.
“Ja’hai-na. There is no humiliation.”
You are literally killing me here.
Finn urges him upstairs, saying that his mother and sister (though using the Cheysuli words, jehana and rujholla) are here. And with that, the chapter ends.
So, we rejoin Carillon in the oubliette. It's a pretty surreal experience, as first, Carillon seems to fall without end, Duncan's words echoing around him. Then he feels himself being caught, suspended by something. He thinks it might be netting. It feels like a cradle. Carillon asks outloud if it's supposed to be like this, but Duncan isn't there to answer.
He starts to think he hears footsteps and whispers. He gets the sense that's floating. Then things get really weird.
For the record, it is really fucking hard to recap a hallucination.
Eventually though, the "feel like a Cheysuli thing" kicks in, and Carillon starts envisioning himself like a wolf. Like Storr: silver-coated, amber-eyed. With such grace as a man could never know.
I can't IMAGINE why that's where your brain went dude.
So Carillon feels himself shapechange and envisions the void. He thinks he understands it now, as a ward against the dazzled eyes of humans who saw the change. He also thinks: No man, seeing the change for what it was, would ever name the Cheysuli men.
And now, neither could I.
It would be kind of hilarious if this made him MORE antagonistic to Cheysuli rather than less.
Carillon feels himself back in the ropes. A man, not a beast. He shouts that Cheysuli phrase: Ja'hai, cheysu, Mujhar!
And then he hears someone call his name. He's pulled out of the oubliette by hands, supporting his head. He thinks its his mother, then realizes it's male:
“Jehan?” I gasped.
“No,” he said. “Rujholli. In this, for this moment, we are.” The hands tightened a moment. “Rujho, it is over.”
“Ja’hai—?”
“Ja’hai-na,” he said soothingly. “Ja’hai-na Homana Mujhar. You are born.”
BornBornBorn. “Ja’hai-na?”
“Accepted,” he said gently. “The king of all blood is born.”
Carillon realizes that he's Homanan again. But for four days, he'd been Cheysuli, his benefactor says. It will be enough.
Gradually Carillon's eyes adjust to the light and he sees a scar on his rescuer's face. It's Finn. Not Duncan.
Of course it is. Hahaha. Even DUNCAN's ritual can't not feel like a marriage ceremony to these idiots.
He slowly comes out of it, and well, just in case we forgot which characters are in this scene, we get:
I put up a hand to my own. I could not touch the color. They had been blue…I wondered now what they were. I wondered what I was…
“A man,” Finn said.
I shut my eyes. I sat very still in the darkness, knowing light only by the faint redness across my lids. I heard my breathing as I had heard it in the pit.
And pa-thump, pa-thump, pa-thump.
“Ja’hai-na,” Finn said gently.
“Ja’hai-na Homana Mujhar.” I reached out and caught his wrist before he could respond. I realized it had been the first time I had out-thought him, anticipating his movement. My fingers were clamped around his wrist as he had once clasped mine, preparing to cut it open. I had no knife, but he did. I had only to put out my other hand and take it.
For fuck's sake. I'm this close to suggesting that you find out if you can fuck in an oubliette.
Carillon makes a point of telling us how Finn doesn't move. He just waits, with Carillon holding his hand. Carillon asks about the shapechange. What it's really like. Finn lacks Homanan words, but Carillon asks for Cheysuli words. Sul'harai he says.
Carillon has heard the word before:
That I had heard before. Once. We had sat up one night in Caledon, lost in our jugs of usca, and spoke as men will about women, saying what we liked. Much had not been said aloud, but we had known. In our minds had been Alix. But out of that night had come a single complex word: sul’harai. It encompassed that which was perfect in the union of man and woman, almost a holy thing. And though the Homanan language lacked the proper words for him, I had heard it in his tone.
Sul’harai. When a man was a woman and a woman a man, two halves of a whole, for that single fleeting instant. And so at last I knew the shapechange.
So Carillon basically had a vision quest that now lets him understand Cheysuli sex. That's how I'm reading this.
Also, Carillon updates us with the ground breaking revelation that Finn is still hot:
Finn moved to the nearest wall and sat against it, resting his forearms on his drawn-up knees. Black hair fell into his face; it needed cutting, as usual. But what I noticed most was how he resembled the lir-shapes upon the wall, even in human form. There is something predatory about the Cheysuli. Something that makes them wild.
Thank you, Carillon. I was worried.
So Carillon asks when Finn came back, a question that makes Finn smile, as he deems it a "Carillon question" and thinks Carillon is recovered. (Meanwhile: Behind him was a hawk with open wings. The stone seemed to encase his shoulders so that he appeared to be sprouting wings. But no, that was his brother’s gift)
OH MY GOD.
Anyway, Finn came back two days ago to find the palace in an uproar over its missing king. Duncan finally told Finn what he'd done. I feel like Duncan probably should have considered what might have happened if Carillon didn't come back. It's not like the qu'mahlin is ancient history.
Finn himself had sort of known about the Womb:
“I knew it was here. Not where, precisely. And I did not know he had intended such a thing.” His brow creased. “He reprimanded me because I had risked you in the star magic, and yet he brought you down here and risked you all over again. I do not understand him.”
That's a completely fair complaint, IMO.
Carillon muses that Duncan might have been Mujhar instead of Carillon. Finn just shrugs, noting that what might have been doesn't matter, and that for a Cheysuli, being clan-leader is enough.
Finn also warns Carillon not to divulge anything. Carillon is Mujhar, not Finn, and the magic will be stronger if Carillon keeps it to himself.
They share a bit more mystic speak before Carillon realizes that he's gone for days without food. Fortunately, Finn comes prepared with usca. Which I imagine being like vodka. He says if Carillon wants real food, he'll have to get dressed.
For his part, Carillon realizes that, well, he'd lost control of his bodily functions in the oubliette:
“Gods,” I said finally, “I cannot go like this—”
Finn fetched the clothing, brought it back and began putting it on me, as if I were a child. “You are too big to carry,” he said when I stood, albeit wobbly, in my boots. “And it might somewhat tarnish your reputation. Carillon the Mujhar, drunk in some corner of his palace. What would the servants say?”
I told him, quite clearly, what I thought of servants speaking out of turn. I did it in the argot of the army we had shared, and it made him smile. And then he grasped my arm a moment.
“Ja’hai-na. There is no humiliation.”
You are literally killing me here.
Finn urges him upstairs, saying that his mother and sister (though using the Cheysuli words, jehana and rujholla) are here. And with that, the chapter ends.
no subject
Date: 2026-03-19 07:50 pm (UTC)Then he feels himself being caught, suspended by something. He thinks it might be netting. It feels like a cradle.
Putting that in its place must have been even more difficult than creating the rooms above, so I'm still quite impressed by how the Cheysuli have done this. It does seem like it will be difficult getting someone out when it's time for that, and I can't help but wonder if (and how many) people have died there...
The hallucination sounds interesting; I do wonder a bit at Carillon talking about how no one will think of the Cheysuli as "men" when they see the shapeshifting, though that might just be because I've read enough of the books to be used to it. I'm also not surprised to see Carillon thinking of himself as a wolf ;)
I rather like how Finnn comforts Carillon once he's done!
But for four days, he'd been Cheysuli, his benefactor says.
That's quite a long time, and I wonder how he managed to go without anything to eat or drink for so long; maybe that has to do with the magic of the place?
It encompassed that which was perfect in the union of man and woman, almost a holy thing. And though the Homanan language lacked the proper words for him, I had heard it in his tone.
That explains some later scenes, I think (I'm specifically thinking of Niall meeting Serri for the first time), and it makes sense. I'd like it better if they had a separate word for it, though; given how important the lir are, it feels like they should have one.
Good to see we still get a nice scene between Carillon and Finn before the former becomes worse.
I feel like Duncan probably should have considered what might have happened if Carillon didn't come back. It's not like the qu'mahlin is ancient history.
Indeed... This ritual is more necessary and most probably less risky than the star magic ritual, but if that had gone wrong, it would have been clearer what happened and wouldn't have caused collateral damage the way this would (since he wasn't king back then). I also think it would have been smart for Duncan to tell at least one other person about where Carillon is at the start, in case he wouldn't be available when something goes wrong.
Finn has become the best character of the book by now, and it speaks well of Roberson's writing skills that she managed to pull that off.
Until next time, then!
no subject
Date: 2026-03-23 11:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2026-03-24 08:01 pm (UTC)I can absolutely understand that, and I'm happy I've gone with the better route!