Stalking Darkness - Chapter Thirteen
Aug. 16th, 2023 10:20 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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i_read_whatSo last time, we had a party and Beka went off to war! Woo!
So this chapter starts with Micum Cavish. He's at home at Watermead, and has just been informed that there are unannounced visitors coming up the hill. We're told that he's been leery of such things since he'd returned from the northlands, despite Nysander's assurances. I don't blame you, Micum. Nysander's sketchy at best.
He recognizes the horses soon enough though: it's Alec and Seregil! Micum wonders if that means Watcher business. He doesn't seem enthused by the prospect. Kari's in better health now and the pregnancy is going well, but she's older than before, and he doesn't like the idea of leaving her.
Illia's run off ahead to meet them. Micum okays it this time, but doesn't want it to be a habit.
This is pretty cute though:
“So I might have to marry Alec when I’m grown,” Illia was prattling across to Seregil. “I hope that won’t hurt your feelings too much.”
Seregil slapped a hand over his heart like a troubadour in a mural. “Ah, fair maiden, I shall slay a thousand evil dragons for you, and lay their steaming black livers at your dainty feet, if only you will restore me to your favor.”
“Livers!” Illia buried her face against Alec’s shoulder with an outraged giggle. “You wouldn’t bring me livers, would you, Alec?”
“Of course not,” Alec scoffed. “What a disgusting present. I’d bring you the eyeballs for a necklace, and all their scaly pointed tongues to tie your braids with.”
Shrieking with delight, Illia slid off into her father’s arms.
Aww, kids are fun.
Micum is relieved that the boys are dressed for visiting rather than travel. And indeed, they've come with the letters from Beka, and the info that her regiment has left already. Micum's disappointed as the family should have been there to see her off.
Seregil also fills him in on the Rhal situation - specifically the foreign swordsmen that had been looking for them.
Micum asks what Nysander has to say about all this. Nothing useful, Mike. Keep up. Seregil just says that he's "keeping a wizard eye out for trouble."
Kari takes the news of Beka's departure better than Micum had worried. Seregil describes the procession quite grandly:
“They looked grand, riding out of the city by torchlight,” he said. “Klia and the high officers rode at the fore in full uniform, helmets and all. And there was our Beka at the head of her turma with a steel lieutenant’s gorget at her throat. The horses had bronze chest plates and cheek pieces that jingled like bells as they rode.”
Kari asks a few questions, but mostly doesn't react, which makes the others uneasy. After dinner, Micum, Kari, Seregil and Alec discuss the Rhal situation. Seregil apparently describes Alec's prowess so flatteringly that he flushes with surprise and Kari hugs him. Micum notes that Rhal seems like a man worth knowing, and this leads to Alec sharing the story about Lady Gwethelyn. He leaves out anything about the disk or Seregil's illness, turning it into something much more humorous than the version Micum had heard at Nysander's tower. Aw. Our boy is learning!
Later that night, Kari tells Micum that she thinks Seregil is in love with Alec. He hadn't been when they visited last, or even at the Festival, but he is now. They're not sure about Alec's feelings though. Micum doesn't think it'd even occur to him, what with his upbringing and all. Kari is sympathetic.
They banter a bit, Micum noting that if Kari really wanted to see Seregil happy and in love, she had her chance to ensure that twenty years ago. It might have been handy to have a bedmate who's good with a sword, after all. But ultimately, he likes the way things turned out.
It is interesting though that both Micum and Kari are aware of Seregil's old unrequited crush. I like that no one has any hard feelings or real discomfort about it. Micum is faithful (and presumably straight). Kari is secure without jealousy. Seregil has moved on romantically and treasures the friendship. It's nice!
Speaking of Seregil, Kari may have been onto something. He and Alec are sharing a bed for the first time since their last visit...and something is different.
He wasn’t certain just when his feelings had gotten away from him, or why. Months of close living and shared dangers, perhaps, together with the genuine affection Seregil knew had existed between them almost from the start.
It figures, he thought dourly as they undressed for bed. He never could seem to love anyone who could return the favor.
Not that Alec didn’t care for him in his own honest, Dalnan way. Seregil had no doubt of that. But he did doubt that Alec’s heart skipped a dizzy beat at the mere thought of sliding in between shared sheets.
Out of deference to Alec’s modesty—or so he told himself—he kept his long shirt on and pulled up the coverlet.
You know, it'd be nice if all these folk who know Alec's sexuality and interests better than Alec does would actually bother to TALK to the kid.
Age difference issues aside, it seems like it should be up to Alec to decide how he feels about things. His repression means he's less likely to think about it on his own, but you can ASK. Maybe not about Seregil specifically, but you can ask how he feels about boys in general!
Reading this as an adult though is interesting, because I do think Alec comes across as fairly asexual. (Which is probably why I side-eye the Ylinestra thing so hard.) He doesn't tend to react to men or women in any significant sexual way. We'll see if that changes once he becomes more aware of things.
I'm actually looking forward to that. When I first read these books, I had only a very faint idea of what asexuality was, and certainly had no grasp of any ace spectrum identities. I remember that Alec and Seregil do get together, but I don't remember if I had any particular read on Alec's sexuality in general. It'll be interesting to see if I read him as repressed-but-allosexual, demisexual or romantic asexual once he becomes more of an active participant in the romantic storyline.
Anyway, Alec is oblivious to Seregil's angst, and quickly goes to sleep. This leads, of course, to some good old fashioned romantic gazing:
Seregil sat up to extinguish the lamp, but paused, caught by the sight of Alec’s thick, honey-gold hair fanned out across the pillow. His expression was peaceful, guileless. His lips curved in a faint smile as if good dreams had already come to him.
For an instant Seregil wondered what it would feel like to have that golden head against his shoulder, the warmth of Alec’s body against his own.
If it had been simple lust Seregil felt, he could easily have driven it off. But what he felt for Alec at that moment went far beyond that. Seregil loved him.
Aw.
He's still a little young, you know... (Though I suppose he could have hit seventeen by now. I do wish fantasy novels would realize that it's not the end of the world to have your young ingenue characters be adults...)
In the morning, we're back with Micum. He's watching Alec stack wood and thinking about how easily the kid seems to fit into the household. And other places: he thinks about all the roles and identities that Alec's had to play since he'd joined Seregil. He compares both men to water, always changing shape.
They decide that Seregil shouldn't miss such a beautiful morning and grab some handfuls of loose snow. Aw, mean! But funny!
Actually, it ends up funnier, as the pranksters get pranked instead!
Stalking in silently, they threw back the quilts and launched their assault, only to find they’d ambushed a bolster.
The shutters banged open behind them and two familiar voices shouted, “Good morning!”
Startled, Micum and Alec looked up just in time to catch a faceful of snow from Seregil and Illia, laughing victoriously outside.
Silly, silly people. A merry chase ensues. Eventually, Seregil gets heaved into a snow drift and sat upon.
I do wonder when exactly Seregil's feelings changed. I can't think of any major event between the festival and now that would explain it. But maybe that's the point. It isn't one event, just the gradual growth of connection?
So they go out hunting (Seregil is "convinced" to come by the threat of another snow drift). They pass on a boar, as they've only got bows instead of spears. At one point, Seregil actually manages to get a grouse. He's more surprised than anyone. Eventually though, they find a bull elk, chase it for half an hour, before Alec takes him down with a quick shot to the heart.
Alec's big on the quick and clean, so the animal doesn't suffer. Yeah, that tracks. When he goes off to refill water skins, Micum takes the moment to talk to Seregil about the whole thing. It almost goes badly though, when Seregil reads a little too far into Micum's gentle probing. But Micum's quick to reassure him:
“I’d never think ill of you for the world. I just think that heart of yours leads you down some hard trails, that’s all. You haven’t said anything to him, have you?”
Seregil’s face was a careful mask of indifference, but his shoulders sagged visibly. “No, and I’m not going to. It wouldn’t be—honorable. I have too much influence over him.”
“Well, he loves you well in his own fashion,” Micum said, unable to think of anything more optimistic.
Aw. Well. Seregil's not wrong about his level of influence over Alec. Even discounting the age element, Alec's the student, foreign, and without money or connections. (Well, except for the connections he's made through Seregil.) It can be easy to forget that, given Alec's general self-possession and resourcefulness.
Still, it'd be nice if someone asked Alec what he wanted out of all of this. I can appreciate why Seregil thinks he can't, but SOMEONE could...
They change subject to Nysander, who's been acting squirrelly and secretive as always. Micum asks if Seregil's found out more on his own, and Seregil says not much, but also that he is oath bound not to talk about it. Micum understands. This moves the conversation back to Alec though, since Alec is smart enough to figure out something's happening and not as apt as Micum to let things lie.
Then things get cryptic:
Micum hunkered down beside him. “If anyone can look out for him, it’s you. But there are some other things you could be telling him. He has a right to know.”
Seregil shot to his feet and waved at Alec as he rode out of the trees toward them. “Not yet,” he said, his voice too soft for Micum to tell if the words were a command or a plea.
Are they talking about Seregil's romantic feelings? Because that seems a bit odd, given Micum's easy acceptance of Seregil's justification for not saying something.
Are they talking about something else?
We won't know, since the chapter ends here.
So this chapter starts with Micum Cavish. He's at home at Watermead, and has just been informed that there are unannounced visitors coming up the hill. We're told that he's been leery of such things since he'd returned from the northlands, despite Nysander's assurances. I don't blame you, Micum. Nysander's sketchy at best.
He recognizes the horses soon enough though: it's Alec and Seregil! Micum wonders if that means Watcher business. He doesn't seem enthused by the prospect. Kari's in better health now and the pregnancy is going well, but she's older than before, and he doesn't like the idea of leaving her.
Illia's run off ahead to meet them. Micum okays it this time, but doesn't want it to be a habit.
This is pretty cute though:
“So I might have to marry Alec when I’m grown,” Illia was prattling across to Seregil. “I hope that won’t hurt your feelings too much.”
Seregil slapped a hand over his heart like a troubadour in a mural. “Ah, fair maiden, I shall slay a thousand evil dragons for you, and lay their steaming black livers at your dainty feet, if only you will restore me to your favor.”
“Livers!” Illia buried her face against Alec’s shoulder with an outraged giggle. “You wouldn’t bring me livers, would you, Alec?”
“Of course not,” Alec scoffed. “What a disgusting present. I’d bring you the eyeballs for a necklace, and all their scaly pointed tongues to tie your braids with.”
Shrieking with delight, Illia slid off into her father’s arms.
Aww, kids are fun.
Micum is relieved that the boys are dressed for visiting rather than travel. And indeed, they've come with the letters from Beka, and the info that her regiment has left already. Micum's disappointed as the family should have been there to see her off.
Seregil also fills him in on the Rhal situation - specifically the foreign swordsmen that had been looking for them.
Micum asks what Nysander has to say about all this. Nothing useful, Mike. Keep up. Seregil just says that he's "keeping a wizard eye out for trouble."
Kari takes the news of Beka's departure better than Micum had worried. Seregil describes the procession quite grandly:
“They looked grand, riding out of the city by torchlight,” he said. “Klia and the high officers rode at the fore in full uniform, helmets and all. And there was our Beka at the head of her turma with a steel lieutenant’s gorget at her throat. The horses had bronze chest plates and cheek pieces that jingled like bells as they rode.”
Kari asks a few questions, but mostly doesn't react, which makes the others uneasy. After dinner, Micum, Kari, Seregil and Alec discuss the Rhal situation. Seregil apparently describes Alec's prowess so flatteringly that he flushes with surprise and Kari hugs him. Micum notes that Rhal seems like a man worth knowing, and this leads to Alec sharing the story about Lady Gwethelyn. He leaves out anything about the disk or Seregil's illness, turning it into something much more humorous than the version Micum had heard at Nysander's tower. Aw. Our boy is learning!
Later that night, Kari tells Micum that she thinks Seregil is in love with Alec. He hadn't been when they visited last, or even at the Festival, but he is now. They're not sure about Alec's feelings though. Micum doesn't think it'd even occur to him, what with his upbringing and all. Kari is sympathetic.
They banter a bit, Micum noting that if Kari really wanted to see Seregil happy and in love, she had her chance to ensure that twenty years ago. It might have been handy to have a bedmate who's good with a sword, after all. But ultimately, he likes the way things turned out.
It is interesting though that both Micum and Kari are aware of Seregil's old unrequited crush. I like that no one has any hard feelings or real discomfort about it. Micum is faithful (and presumably straight). Kari is secure without jealousy. Seregil has moved on romantically and treasures the friendship. It's nice!
Speaking of Seregil, Kari may have been onto something. He and Alec are sharing a bed for the first time since their last visit...and something is different.
He wasn’t certain just when his feelings had gotten away from him, or why. Months of close living and shared dangers, perhaps, together with the genuine affection Seregil knew had existed between them almost from the start.
It figures, he thought dourly as they undressed for bed. He never could seem to love anyone who could return the favor.
Not that Alec didn’t care for him in his own honest, Dalnan way. Seregil had no doubt of that. But he did doubt that Alec’s heart skipped a dizzy beat at the mere thought of sliding in between shared sheets.
Out of deference to Alec’s modesty—or so he told himself—he kept his long shirt on and pulled up the coverlet.
You know, it'd be nice if all these folk who know Alec's sexuality and interests better than Alec does would actually bother to TALK to the kid.
Age difference issues aside, it seems like it should be up to Alec to decide how he feels about things. His repression means he's less likely to think about it on his own, but you can ASK. Maybe not about Seregil specifically, but you can ask how he feels about boys in general!
Reading this as an adult though is interesting, because I do think Alec comes across as fairly asexual. (Which is probably why I side-eye the Ylinestra thing so hard.) He doesn't tend to react to men or women in any significant sexual way. We'll see if that changes once he becomes more aware of things.
I'm actually looking forward to that. When I first read these books, I had only a very faint idea of what asexuality was, and certainly had no grasp of any ace spectrum identities. I remember that Alec and Seregil do get together, but I don't remember if I had any particular read on Alec's sexuality in general. It'll be interesting to see if I read him as repressed-but-allosexual, demisexual or romantic asexual once he becomes more of an active participant in the romantic storyline.
Anyway, Alec is oblivious to Seregil's angst, and quickly goes to sleep. This leads, of course, to some good old fashioned romantic gazing:
Seregil sat up to extinguish the lamp, but paused, caught by the sight of Alec’s thick, honey-gold hair fanned out across the pillow. His expression was peaceful, guileless. His lips curved in a faint smile as if good dreams had already come to him.
For an instant Seregil wondered what it would feel like to have that golden head against his shoulder, the warmth of Alec’s body against his own.
If it had been simple lust Seregil felt, he could easily have driven it off. But what he felt for Alec at that moment went far beyond that. Seregil loved him.
Aw.
He's still a little young, you know... (Though I suppose he could have hit seventeen by now. I do wish fantasy novels would realize that it's not the end of the world to have your young ingenue characters be adults...)
In the morning, we're back with Micum. He's watching Alec stack wood and thinking about how easily the kid seems to fit into the household. And other places: he thinks about all the roles and identities that Alec's had to play since he'd joined Seregil. He compares both men to water, always changing shape.
They decide that Seregil shouldn't miss such a beautiful morning and grab some handfuls of loose snow. Aw, mean! But funny!
Actually, it ends up funnier, as the pranksters get pranked instead!
Stalking in silently, they threw back the quilts and launched their assault, only to find they’d ambushed a bolster.
The shutters banged open behind them and two familiar voices shouted, “Good morning!”
Startled, Micum and Alec looked up just in time to catch a faceful of snow from Seregil and Illia, laughing victoriously outside.
Silly, silly people. A merry chase ensues. Eventually, Seregil gets heaved into a snow drift and sat upon.
I do wonder when exactly Seregil's feelings changed. I can't think of any major event between the festival and now that would explain it. But maybe that's the point. It isn't one event, just the gradual growth of connection?
So they go out hunting (Seregil is "convinced" to come by the threat of another snow drift). They pass on a boar, as they've only got bows instead of spears. At one point, Seregil actually manages to get a grouse. He's more surprised than anyone. Eventually though, they find a bull elk, chase it for half an hour, before Alec takes him down with a quick shot to the heart.
Alec's big on the quick and clean, so the animal doesn't suffer. Yeah, that tracks. When he goes off to refill water skins, Micum takes the moment to talk to Seregil about the whole thing. It almost goes badly though, when Seregil reads a little too far into Micum's gentle probing. But Micum's quick to reassure him:
“I’d never think ill of you for the world. I just think that heart of yours leads you down some hard trails, that’s all. You haven’t said anything to him, have you?”
Seregil’s face was a careful mask of indifference, but his shoulders sagged visibly. “No, and I’m not going to. It wouldn’t be—honorable. I have too much influence over him.”
“Well, he loves you well in his own fashion,” Micum said, unable to think of anything more optimistic.
Aw. Well. Seregil's not wrong about his level of influence over Alec. Even discounting the age element, Alec's the student, foreign, and without money or connections. (Well, except for the connections he's made through Seregil.) It can be easy to forget that, given Alec's general self-possession and resourcefulness.
Still, it'd be nice if someone asked Alec what he wanted out of all of this. I can appreciate why Seregil thinks he can't, but SOMEONE could...
They change subject to Nysander, who's been acting squirrelly and secretive as always. Micum asks if Seregil's found out more on his own, and Seregil says not much, but also that he is oath bound not to talk about it. Micum understands. This moves the conversation back to Alec though, since Alec is smart enough to figure out something's happening and not as apt as Micum to let things lie.
Then things get cryptic:
Micum hunkered down beside him. “If anyone can look out for him, it’s you. But there are some other things you could be telling him. He has a right to know.”
Seregil shot to his feet and waved at Alec as he rode out of the trees toward them. “Not yet,” he said, his voice too soft for Micum to tell if the words were a command or a plea.
Are they talking about Seregil's romantic feelings? Because that seems a bit odd, given Micum's easy acceptance of Seregil's justification for not saying something.
Are they talking about something else?
We won't know, since the chapter ends here.